Little Turkey

Retirement

2009-09-14T17:35:00.002-04:00

Ever since we came to this Island it seems all I can focus on is leaving. Not that there is anything wrong with Hawaii... Everybody tells me I am living in paradise, after all. And let's face it, after Japan this IS paradise. I have been here a year now and I all I can think of is how we only have 2 more left until we leave and we are finally finished with the Marine Corps. I am done with the "lifestyle"... I want my own house to raise my children in, I want to be with my family and friends, and have our own land. It will be so nice to have a house to make our own and not have to worry about packing up and moving in a couple of years. We are two years from our final move and I am already making preparations in my head... When should we sell the house in Texas, when should we ship the dogs back, should be start Emily's second grade class in NY or here, when should I go back with the kids... It's allot to figure out. Next year this time though we will be figuring out everything on a month to month basis I know. This "final move" with being so far away is going to take allot of planning on all accounts.

Speaking of Hawaii... I might be getting the fever, the Island fever. I have seen and done pretty much everything I would want to do aside from seeing another Island. I guess Keith and I going to take a trip to another Island during the Christmas break with the kids. Our gift to each other... It might be nice to play the role of a tourist and enjoy what a resort has to offer. After all when you live here you still have kids, husband, laundy, and a house to take care of. It's not like I can lounge on the beach all day with a little umbrella drink. People don't seem to get that. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate it here... I just don't love it either. It's good for now and I am trying to enjoy everything it has to offer (Except the local "aloha" spirit, that is an entirely different story) and not wish it away. However with being so far from family and retirement right around the corner it is hard at times not to.

The kids are good. Em started school. I am still trying to wrap my head around her being old enough to go. She is having issues with writing but then again Em has always taken her time doing things and with practice she always does well. At first I was very stressed about it but after giving myself some time I know she will do fine. Nothing in life has come very easily for Em but she has always tried her hardest and never gives up. Her problems at school are more mine, not hers. Her teacher says she is doing fine, we just need to work at her pace. I have had to take step back and let her be Emily...

Oli is good. She is talking more and climbing anything she can. She is a stinker but overall a good stinker. I can't complain about her not eating or sleeping. She does both well. She still has the blue eyes and the white hair that stops people where ever we go. Now with Em at school she is enjoying her Mommy time. She loves to snuggle and loves all the attention to herself. I thought she might be upset with Em being gone but she hasn't had any issues because she enjoys having me to herself. Once it's time to get Em she is happy to have her back.

Em has become more and more my little helper. The other day I had went grocery shopping for a few things. I had about 5-6 bags that I had unloaded and had to attend to Oli for something. When I got done Emily had taken everything out of the bags and put it all away without me asking. I was surprised!! She will also empty the dishwasher, set the table, help with the laundry, and do odd things to help with her sister. She amazes with me... Not that she can help, that she wants to! LOL

So Keith and I have planned to go home in June. Keith for about 3 weeks and me 6 with the girls. I figure if we are going to spend the money then we will make it worth it! Not to mention that Em has been asking repeatedly to go there. She misses everyone so much. She talks about NY and our family everyday... she needs to go there and be with them all and Oli needs to bond with them as well.

Nothing else is going on. Just going the normal day to day thing... Laundry, helping Em with school, cooking meals, taking care of the house, and running errands. The normal Mom/wife thing. I am on FB pretty often. I can stay in touch with everyone, I feel more like apart of everyone's life through there. Keith and I play games against each other... If I didn't have facebook I would probably feel so more disconnected here. So if you don't have an account you need to get one... you're like one of the only people left on the planet who doesn't have one!!

That's all for now... Bored so I thought I would write a small update... Until later....

Happy First Birthday - March 11, 09

2009-03-10T18:03:00.003-04:00

Happy Birthday Olivia Rose!! Your are Mommy's little treasure, a true gift, and a blessing every day.

You can say Mama, Dada, Daddy, bye-bye (and wave), give kisses, and point to everything you want, and say love to say AhhhhOhhhhh....

You eat all table food (since 9 months), drink milk, have two bottles a day now. You started taking steps at 11 months and can now walk up to around 20 feet on your own. You love to snuggle, you adore your sister, love sharing snacks with your doggies, and looking at pictures in books. You love to dance, hate being in the car for too long, love going for walks, and you love your baths.

You are a true joy to raise, a reminder to me every day that wishes can come true. You are beautiful inside and out. When you came into our lives you completed our family truly and completely.

I love you so much my little blue eyed turkey....

My favorite pic

2009-02-11T23:35:00.000-05:00

Our house from the park

2009-02-11T23:33:00.000-05:00

Em today climbing a tree

2009-02-11T23:32:00.000-05:00

Pics of Oli from today

2009-02-11T23:29:00.000-05:00

I am not impressed

2009-02-11T18:26:00.003-05:00

I take back what I said a couple of posts down. Obama is making some major mistakes. President or not, I am not so sure I can back this guy up anymore. Don't get me wrong, I still want him to do well for this Country but so far he seems to be making some critical mistakes. I have a feeling I am going to end up saying "I told you so"...

Just Because

2009-01-23T16:35:00.000-05:00

Emmy in her "Princess" dress from Nanny and one of my favorite Oli smiles

Bye Bye George

2009-01-22T14:15:00.002-05:00

Okay, so let's just get this over with shall we? I am going to miss George. I LOVED GW. I have made no secrets about that. I truly believed he did what was in the best interest for our Country and did what he had to do to keep us all safe. He was our President... and I supported him. Sure he wasn't perfect but the last time I checked I haven't met a politician who was. He had some very difficult issues to deal with and he handled them. You may not have agreed with how he did it but you are in your home safe and this Country did not see another terrorist attack after 911.

The media tore him apart dividing this Country when we should have been standing together. Celebrities who are overpaid entertainers felt the need to voice their opinion, telling us, the common folk how to think. Hatred grew and spread like wild fire...The media mocked every little thing he did and said almost relishing in the hatred they grew for him. It sickens me as an American, as a military wife that the American people acted in such a way to one of our Presidents. Our nation's leader that OUR OWN people voted into office. There is many Americans who should be ashamed of themselves...

Which leads me to the obvious... Obama. I did not want him to be the next President. I am very Conservative and he is not. That is what it boils down to.

However...He IS our President now. I REFUSE to be one of "those" people. I will not bring myself to that level of the GW's haters, the media, the celebrities. The American people voted him in to office. I can accept that as that is one of the rights my husband defends...

I hope he does well for this Country. I hope his little girls stay safe and sound. I hope our Country can unite once again and stand strong as we have in the past. I can now honestly say to my daughters... There are no barriers in America. White, Black, Man, Woman... you can be President of the United States. That is an accomplishment we should all be proud of.

So, Good Luck Mr. President, you are going to need it. God Bless you, God Bless America.

Yes, I am still here

2009-01-16T12:06:00.004-05:00

I have no idea where to start, I have fallen so far behind with this blog. I used to be so good at keeping it updated but it seems I have very little time on my hands for much of anything this past year or so.

Speaking of this past year... where the hell did it go? I was in NY preggo, had the baby, went on a road trip with Kari and Sami to get Keith in NC after him being deployed for 7 months in Iraq, drove back to NY, back to NC, back to NY for Keith's mother, and back to NC. We had our house packed, lived in temporary housing in NC, flew to Hawaii... lived in temporary housing here. Got the house, the cars, moved in. Got settled, finally got the dogs flown here from NY, bought a van for when family/friends come to visit... Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and BAM the year is gone!!! It's just insane to me how fast this past year flew by.

All that time the kiddos have grown... Emily looks different to me. Her facial features have changed a bit. She looks more mature and I can't help but look at her and think she is just stunning. She is just a natural beauty. She starts school in July here. I am on the fence about that when it comes to my emotions. I know she needs it to help her mature more but the idea of her starting "real" school makes me so sad. She won't be home with me every day and that saddens me greatly. It seems to me as well that once children start school it's a milestone where they grow and mature way too quickly... Emily is very innocent and I know once school starts that it will slowly disappear and her eyes will be more open to allot more ugly things about the world. You want to shelter your children, keep them safe, and blinded towards allot of nastiness in the world... I know I can't keep her in a bubble all her life but it would sure be nice if I could.
On the other hand, there is no way I could home school. It has been a slow process teaching Emily her ABC's and numbers. Emily does not pick things up quickly nor do things come easily to her. She has a hard time focusing but once she gets something she's got it and she does well with it. She has been like that since she was a baby. You could never make her do anything, she was always a bit behind in all her milestones but once she got them she excelled at them. For example, her speech. I think she was in speech therapy for a year and half and now I can't get her to shut up....EVER! LOL She needs a classroom setting to do well at school. It will help her focus and she will want to keep up with her peers. One thing that she is really interested in and knows allot about for a person her age is the computer. She knows how to do ALLOT on a computer... not just games but using picture programs, how to turn things on and off... get into programs, uses the mouse, gets on the Internet... I wouldn't be surprised if she does something computer oriented as far as jobs go in the future... that or modeling...LOL Or both!

Now Olivia, things come easily for her and way too quickly. She isn't walking yet but it won't be long. She "speaks" well for her age. She says Mama and Dada and uses them correctly for Keith and I... she says Bye Bye and can't say Emmy but knows who she is. She knows most of what we are saying... and does well with listening as far as a 10 month old baby goes. She is probably over 20 pounds now and can fit into 12 month and some 18 month old clothing already. Her blue eyes are stunning and are the color of a clear sky day. Her hair is a very light blond and being here in Hawaii she gets allot of attention for that by the locals. We get stopped allot while shopping just so people can look at her. She is a true beauty and has a smile that will break hearts. She is a pretty easy baby to care for so far. She goes to bed easily (knock on wood), eats well, is not picky, listens, is easily entertained, likes to snuggle (except when falling asleep), and is every patient. I guess second children have to be! LOL She crawls all over the place, plays well by herself or with her sister, loves her bath, hates kisses from the dogs and let's them know it. She has been sleeping through the nights since she was 5 months old... talks allot and laughs, gives kisses, likes Elmo, and loves her blankey and her pink dolly whom she hugs. She has been eating table foods since she was around 8 months old. She has 8 teeth and is a little chunk. I am sure people look at my girls and wonder if they are true blooded sisters as they look nothing alike. Both are going to cause allot of headaches for Keith once they get older. Emily now attracts boys from the neighborhood... they stop by to talk with her when we are outside and Keith literally chases them away and is truly enraged with the idea of her just talking to any boy. Keith also has gotten allot more gray hairs these past couple of years...I have to keep reminding him that they are kids her age and just want to play, not ask for her hand in marriage.

So, that about sums it up with the girls.

As far as us goes... Hawaii is still really awesome. There is just an incredible amount of things to do here. And of course the weather doesn't hurt either. My parents are coming out in February and are staying for a long time. Keith and I both can't wait. We are all going to have allot of fun, they are getting out of the cold, snow, and ice, and we get live in baby sitters!! LOL

We have another little niece entering our lives this year. Although her parents can't seem to come up with a name for her yet! LOL We can't wait to meet her... Of course we miss all our family and our friends. That is the hardest part being here. I didn't care much for North Carolina but at least we were in a place that was drivable to go home and see everyone. With the time difference it's harder to keep in touch and I feel very left out of everyone life and the "loop". It sucks not seeing our nieces and nephews grow and having our kiddos grow up along with them. At least though when everyone comes to see us we all will have some really nice things to do together. And it is also good to know that we are on the countdown to Keith military career retirement. This is our last duty station.

And speaking of my husband... I am very proud to say that he was selected for Master Sergeant. If you don't know anything about the military/Marine Corps that means on the Enlisted side of the house he can only pick up one more rank and that's all that's left. It only goes up to E-9 and Keith will be an E-8 come February first. I am extremely proud of him as getting this promotion in his MOS (his job within the Marine Corps) was very competitive this year. So for him to get it makes it that more meaningful to me and to him as well. This is the first time in his career that I was emotional about him picking up a rank. Our tour in North Carolina was difficult and he was gone for half of the time we were there... if not more with all the field exercises. He missed a third of Emily's life, he missed Olivia's birth, and it at times put a strain on our marriage. He was hand picked by his previous CO to work a job in his unit that involved a multitude of challenges, extremely long hours in NC and in Iraq. He worked 7 months straight for 14 hours a day or more without one single day off. He met those challenges above and beyond for that is the type of Marine he is. I am so proud of him and maybe just maybe all that he endured and what we endured as a family these past few years might have been worth it for him to pin MSgt on at a time when it was a bit more challenging to get it. So, on February 1st I will glady and proudly take his new chevrons and slam the shit out of them in his collar bone. Because I know, he wouldn't have it any other way... (It's a Marine thing, as they say... you have to know one to understand)

So, that is my update. Hope everyone is doing well and staying warm. I will bask in the sun for you and try to send a bit a warmth your way... ;)

Later

Too All of you...

2008-12-24T19:41:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas

Sisters

2008-11-13T23:29:00.001-05:00

I was just farting around with a different program for the videos that I make. I think I am just going to invest in a different one. This program was easy to use but it's kind of boring. Anyway, here it is...

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It's get'in hot in here

2008-11-13T11:32:00.004-05:00

It seems like all of the sudden I have a totally different child. Why does it have to happen so fast? Why can't it be a slow process of development? What makes a baby suddenly want to sit up and learn to crawl? She was fine with laying down just a couple of days ago. Now she is sitting up, playing with her toys, and just seconds shy of crawling around the room. What the hell? I wish she wouldn't be in such a rush. Oli has several teeth now and two more making their way down as well. No more gummy smiles, no more baby bath tub, and shortly no more baby food. She has about had it with the baby food. All she wants now is what we are eating. She does really well with table food (no meats yet), and does great picking it up and feeding herself as well. Macaroni and cheese is pretty much her favorite at the moment. She yells at you if you don't get food in her mouth as fast as she would like!!

I am having such a hard time believing that she is 8 months already. That just doesn't seem possible to me. Besides that it doesn't seem at all possible that Thanksgiving is coming up already, never mind Christmas. This last year FLOWN by!! I guess I had allot going on this past year and that is what you get when you are busy. It feels like I just blinked and it's all but over with.

I know I have been sucking big time at keeping this thing updated. I never really have a moment of peace to think, that is pretty much why. Once the kids are up and about they are both usually pulling me in different directions for their attention and needs. Then there is the dogs, keeping this huge ass house clean, the husband when he gets home from work, and by the end of the day all I want to do is go to sleep. There is not much room for downtime, quiet time, or time to myself. I am not complaining, it just is what it is. After living in that small house in NC I forgot what it is like to live in a bigger home. God forbid I should be lazy one day and not want to do much cleaning, the place looks and is f*cked up. There is always something to clean and pick up. ALWAYS.

Can I tell you how strange it is to think that it's winter back in NY? It is so easy to forget the holidays are approaching here. Nothing feels like winter, nothing feels like it's the holidays. It's still 85 here everyday, sunny, the grass is green, we still have flowers, and we are still going to the beach. I know "Poor me" right? :) I am just saying, it is strange to see pictures of family and they are all dressed head to toe in big bulky clothing, jackets and hats. It is also strange to be shaking from the "cold" weather at night when it plunges down to 75!! Brrrrrr......

So, Em is playing soccer. She is pretty good at it when she decides to let go of her self consciousness and play. She is so worried that her "friends" there will laugh at her if she screws up. I don't know where she got that from. Maybe pre-school??? But anyway, it's annoys me because I don't want her to worry about what others think of her. I just want her to be herself and say "screw you" to the world. For Halloween I got one of those canned hair colors. I sprayed her hair this crazy pink color. Keith and I were telling her how great it looked and to look in the mirror... She looked and within two seconds flat she was crying. Sobbing big tears... saying "my friends are going to laugh at me" After much talking and convincing she finally went out with her pink hair and had a good time. Why she thinks like that though is beyond me. Keith and I have never said to her she had to be perfect or else... So, I am hoping it's just one of those weird stages.

Aside from that Emily is doing fine. Stubborn as always but good. She has such a strong personality and she has tried my patience with it! She has such a hard time focusing on what I from her or what I am saying to her because all she can think about is what she wants to say and what she wants. Our communication has been clashing because of it. That and my patience is wearing thin from it. It it mentally exhausting to repeat myself so much, and having to be on top of her with every little thing I ask. I literally have to make her look at me and force her to listen in order to have a conversation that I know she is acknowledging. I feel bad for her because I know allot of my attention has been and still is on Olivia. It is not something I can help though... It's not like I can leave Oli on the floor to fend for herself. It's not like she takes anything out on Oli, she is really good to Oli and helps out allot with her. I just think she does things towards me that demands more of my attention on purpose. Since the dogs have gotten here though she has been gearing more of her attention and playtime toward them. She really plays with them both allot and keeps them on their toes. Literally, on their toes, running, chasing them, dressing them up, ... never really any time for those doggy naps that they love oh so much!!

Olivia like I said is growing too quickly. She is so big and chunky!! I am enjoying her baby time as short as it is... I know what awaits me down the road... At least that is one good thing about having another child, you know what to expect! Which can be both good and bad!! Other than growing too quickly she is doing great. She loves to "talk" and loves to do anything with her big sister. She eats great, sleeps great (Thank you Jesus!!), and is up to par with her peers. She likes to give kisses, is wanting to stand more, loves to jump in her jumper, play with her toys, and in general just wants to be with us and involved with what we are doing. Right now she is easy to please and an over all good baby. The two things that everyone tells me daily is what a good baby she is and what beautiful eyes she has. Both are true...

So, that about wraps things up at the moment. I have a couple more pictures I took this weekend in my failed attempts of Christmas card pictures of the girls. That was fun... (insert my eyes rolling) I think my next attempt is going to have to be during the morning when the sun is not at it's peak and find a beach that has softer sand. Fun times...

So, until next time...

Oh yeah, and thanks to my sister I now have become a Lost addict. I am on Season 2. Anyone know of how I can be an Extra on the show? :)

2008-11-04T21:08:00.000-05:00

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2008-11-04T20:56:00.000-05:00

Pics

2008-11-04T20:48:00.003-05:00

I guess I have failed to post any pictures of Hawaii. My sister in law's sister in law (did you get that?), said she wanted some... so here ya go Mary. That is about all I have!! Sorry!!

You will also find some pictures of the girls as I can't help myself. Everything is fine, just very busy these days. Friday is the Marine Corps Ball so I might post a couple of pics from there.

Later people...

2008-11-04T20:48:00.000-05:00

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2008-11-04T20:25:00.000-05:00

Together again

2008-10-09T22:24:00.000-04:00

What do these things equal?
120 days of Quarantine
Blood work sent to Kentucky for labwork
microchips
4 pages worth of completed checkmarks of things that were needed to be able to enter Hawaii
Numerous Exams , health certificates, and vaccines & meds
Quarantine fees
2 FDA approved kennels and accessories
Plane Tickets for two days worth of flying
One overnight stay in a pet hotel and two cab rides from the airport and back to the airport
And last but not least over 3000 dollars worth of fees and bills?

Lots of Boston Snorting and Snuggles.

Thank God that shit is finally over....

Dive Of Death my Ass

2008-09-25T18:58:00.000-04:00

For anyone who wasted two hours of their lives as I did last watching David Blanes Dive of Death... Was that just pathetic or what? Hey ABC... My 60 year old mother and I can do the same "stunt" and you won't half to pay us nearly as much!

Is this a trick question?

2008-09-23T17:47:00.001-04:00

I want everyone to look at this picture very carefully.

Look...

Look...

Notice anything? I'll give you a hint...

Somebody at a store just asked me how old my twins were.

Enough said.

What the Bloody Hell?

2008-09-22T20:18:00.003-04:00

I don't know what it is exactly about me but I attract all the crazy people, not matter where I live. As many of you know I am not exactly a "people person". I don't give off that "Hey, I am a very friendly person" look/vibe either so I guess that doesn't help.... that and always sputtering things out of my mouth that maybe I should try to keep in my head more often. AND... my potty mouth usually gives me some odd looks more often than not. I guess it's not every day you go to KMarts and see a mother with her two little girls cursing out loud about the line from hell. It's not my fault though people... I mean how hard it is to figure out that if you have one register open and 30 people making a curved line through out your store it might be time to open some more? So, I decided I was going to help the woman out who was standing behind a closed register talking to another employee like she had nothing damn better to do. "Hey" I said, (Nice and bloody loud of course), "are you going to open any time soon?" She looked at me and said "I am closed". and then went about her conversation. So, I did what any other New Yorker would do and replied back. "Yeah, that makes perfect fucking since". I guess that kind of shocked a few people in line as I got a few "looks" Give me a fucking break okay? I am waiting in a line that is half a mile long for a friggin 3 dollar Rattle and a pack of Gummi Worms with two kids who have the patience of a fruit fly ... The Bitch is lucky I didn't take the pack of Gummi worms and throw it across her head to help her get it out of her ass... I haven't worked in retail for a long time but I sometimes wonder if the only qualification you need to do is being able to breath.

I guess some other employee heard me and ran over to another register and opened it up. So... that leads me to the crazy (And I don't mean me). I am waiting to pay for Emily's friggin Gummi Worms when the woman in back of me decides to try to make conversation. People... have you ever gone in a store and just wanted to leave to go take some sort of shower that sterilized your entire body? Just looking at this woman made my skin want to crawl off and wait for me outside the store for fear of absorbing any of her filthy germs. Blah... Anyway, she starts asking me questions about the baby and none of which I can answer because she has absolutely no teeth in her head and when she talks her lips start flapping. So, I just stand there pushing Emily behind me, making sure the crazy doesn't lean into the stroller, and making that fake smile nodding my head. As soon as we stepped out the door I got my anti germ gel and bathed the kids and I in it. Some times I wonder why I even bother.

I have a question for you. Why is it that the stores in Hawaii sell winter clothing and jackets? Why is it that I live in a place that is 90 all year round so I want to buy extra bathing suits for the kids but I can't find any? I guess I could go to the tourist area and look but I refuse to pay that much for 4 year old's bathing suit. I don't understand why stores don't market the area they sell in. Thank God though that I can still find big ass bright shirts with a tropical print on it any where I go!

THANK
GOD!

Speaking of God, but in an entirely different manner... My Grandmother just passed away a few days ago. She lived a long life... I am not happy that she is gone but I am happy that she got to live so long and see her great grand kids. It's been hard going home and seeing her in a nursing home knowing in her past she was so full of life. It's hard knowing that she couldn't remember that life either. I hope she is in a place now where she can remember us all and the times she spent with us. Of course I couldn't go to the funeral and say goodbye so I just want to write a few things to her that I remember and hope that she can now enjoy those memories as I will always hold them close to my heart.

Dear Gram, Thank you for all the trips you took Kris, Sherry, and I on. It was something I always looked forward to every summer and you never disappointed us. Thanks for watching us during the summers and making your little people pancakes upon request. Thank you for the never caring when we drug out all your sheets and blankets to make huge forts in your basement. Thanks for all the times you watched us dance our silly dances, the card games out on the patio, and the walks through the rose garden. Thanks for teaching me how to make chocolate chip cookies... and endless sleep overs, home made shirts, and Christmas tree decorations. Thanks for hugs, the kisses, and songs you sang while you rocked us. Thank you for entrusting me with your mother's ring, and the laughs we had calling Grandpa "Grumpy". Thanks for loving us all and for being Sherry's rock and bringing stability in her short life. Thank you for being Grandma to us all and making our childhood special. I will miss you but I know you are better off where you are... Know how much I love you....

PS... Give Sherry a hug for me and tell her that her cousin misses her every day...

Well...the kids are hollering for their mother, I guess I better get off my booty. Later.

To Our Tucker Boo

2008-09-11T15:22:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday!

We love you and miss you... Hope to see you in a couple of weeks!!

Love Mommy, Daddy and your Emmy and Oli

Kisses to you and Bree....

PS. Be Good on the plane, it's a long flight so don't go pee in your crates!!! LOL

Hello World

2008-09-10T12:57:00.003-04:00

We are back to living a semi normal life. I say "semi" because life with a 6 month old and a 4 year old isn't exactly always normal. Speaking of which, Oli is turning 6 months old tomorrow! 6 MONTHS OLD! How the hell did that happen? She is doing great. She refuses to sit up which is fine by me because once she does that she will start crawling and I am not ready for the moving yet. I have to say though that she is a pretty easy baby to take care of, for the most part. She has her moments. The poor thing has one tooth after another coming in and that has been hard on her. She started sleeping through the night now thanks to my Mother who reminded me that Oli is old enough (and chunky enough), to go without a bottle through the night. She was right. The night after I talked to her I heard Oli whimper once and she fell right back to sleep and didn't wake again until 6am. She has been sleeping 12 hours for the past few nights now so my brain is feeling less and less like it's in a coma. I know it won't always be like that as she get older, things will change but it's nice while it last. Sleep is a wonderful thing people. It's nice to get some after months without.

Emily is Em. The poor girl has gone through allot in the past year. I think it all finally caught up with her as we have been having issues with her being scared of being alone. She seems to finally be a bit better but it's not 100 percent yet. I keep reminding myself to be patient but it's hard when you are trying to go pee and a 4 year old is standing right beside you. We enrolled her in a daycare on one of the bases for two days a week for 4 hours at a time. I can already see a difference. She is already willing to separate herself for a few minutes to run up the stairs to get something quick. That would not have happened just last week so it's an improvement. She is also doing this "body tremor" thing before falling asleep which we are taking her to the doctor for. It's not a seizure as she responds to you if you wake her up by calling to her. I am not sure what it is... A Tic, muscle spasms, stress... it could be anything. She only does it on her belly and not when she is awake at all. It very rigid and strong movements. I will let you know what the doctor says about it. Other than that though she is good. She loves her new room and her and Oli's playroom. She likes the daycare (or the school as we call it), and she is thrilled to finally have all her things again. She had a mental inventory of everything that she was supposed to get out of the boxes when the movers came. Once everything had a place and put away she would remember something and freak out if she couldn't find it. Finally she knows she has everything and is content and enjoying it all again. Em keeps asking about "Special Work" as well and we keep telling her that Daddy does not have to go back. It is something that she worries about. We have brought her to Daddy's work so she can see where he goes every day, she can see the fire trucks and gets in them with Daddy. We want her to understand that he is never far and has it in her head exactly where he is going to be. I think it has helped and trusts that he will be home at night. Slowly we are getting back to normal and she is able to trust in the routine and not worry about things that she has worried about for a year now. Now the most difficult thing for her to understand is how far away we are from Grandma, Grandpa, Nanny, and Grand Dad... and of course her Catie. She wants so badly to see everyone and misses them so much after spending so much time with them. It is hard on her not seeing them all, and of course the same for me. Living in Hawaii is a dream but being away from family is difficult on both Em and I. She enjoys talking to everyone on the phone now and she thinks it's the most wonderful thing in the world when she gets a special surprise in the mail. I am thinking of getting a cork board and putting it in her room and fill it will pictures of family for her. I think she would really like that. Hopefully everyone will be able to come and visit when they can.

So, Hawaii is very nice. We LOVE LOVE LOVE our house. I will have to post some pictures later of the outside so you can see it finally. I am getting to know my way around and feel more comfortable driving. I don't really like driving on the main highways here because everyone drives so differently it makes me uncomfortable. I don't know how to explain it but to sum it up I don't trust others because I don't know what to expect from them. The shopping is unbelievable here. I have never seen shopping malls/plazas/centers as massive as there are here. The food is awesome and it's a challenge just do decide on what you want while out. If you can believe it I have only been to the beach once. Keith has been a few times but with Oli being so little it's not something I really want to do. Once she is sitting up and can play more I will be more willing to go.

So that about sums everything up at the moment. Oli is good and growing strong. It won't be long now before she gets the idea to start crawling. She is eating solids really well and growing teeth. All she wants is to be held and loved at the moment so I am enjoying that while it lasts. Em is talking great now. She still pronounces her "R's" as a "W" but that is it really. The things she says and talks about cracks me up. She is in the questioning everything stage. Why this, why that... She is a wonderful big sister and helps out with Oli as much as possible. She loves riding her bike, going shopping, and talking on the phone. I can't get over how big she is now and how much older she looks. It seems like she should still be the baby and now I have another that seems to be growing too fast. I keep telling Oli she is not allowed to grow as fast as her sister but she refuses to listen to me.
Anyway... I will posts some pictures of the house later. And how great is it that I am going to be an Aunt again???? I am so excited for Kari, Ian, Scott, and Sami...

Well, better get a move on. I think the kiddos might want to eat... Later

A couple of my latest Favs

2008-09-10T12:57:00.000-04:00

Best Ever, Sarah Palin's speech

2008-09-04T18:05:00.000-04:00

Mr. Chairman, delegates, and fellow citizens: I am honored to be considered for the nomination for vice president of the United States ...

I accept the call to help our nominee for president to serve and defend America.
I accept the challenge of a tough fight in this election ... against confident opponents ... at a crucial hour for our country.
And I accept the privilege of serving with a man who has come through much harder missions ... and met far graver challenges ... and knows how tough fights are won — the next president of the United States, John S. McCain.
It was just a year ago when all the experts in Washington counted out our nominee because he refused to hedge his commitment to the security of the country he loves.
With their usual certitude, they told us that all was lost — there was no hope for this candidate who said that he would rather lose an election than see his country lose a war.
But the pollsters and pundits overlooked just one thing when they wrote him off.
They overlooked the caliber of the man himself — the determination, resolve, and sheer guts of Senator John McCain. The voters knew better.
And maybe that's because they realize there is a time for politics and a time for leadership ... a time to campaign and a time to put our country first.
Our nominee for president is a true profile in courage, and people like that are hard to come by.
He's a man who wore the uniform of this country for 22 years, and refused to break faith with those troops in Iraq who have now brought victory within sight.
And as the mother of one of those troops, that is exactly the kind of man I want as commander in chief. I'm just one of many moms who'll say an extra prayer each night for our sons and daughters going into harm's way.
Our son Track is 19.
And one week from tomorrow — September 11th — he'll deploy to Iraq with the Army infantry in the service of his country.
My nephew Kasey also enlisted, and serves on a carrier in the Persian Gulf.
My family is proud of both of them and of all the fine men and women serving the country in uniform. Track is the eldest of our five children.
In our family, it's two boys and three girls in between — my strong and kindhearted daughters Bristol, Willow, and Piper.
And in April, my husband Todd and I welcomed our littlest one into the world, a perfectly beautiful baby boy named Trig. From the inside, no family ever seems typical.
That's how it is with us.
Our family has the same ups and downs as any other ... the same challenges and the same joys.
Sometimes even the greatest joys bring challenge.
And children with special needs inspire a special love.
To the families of special-needs children all across this country, I have a message: For years, you sought to make America a more welcoming place for your sons and daughters.
I pledge to you that if we are elected, you will have a friend and advocate in the White House. Todd is a story all by himself.
He's a lifelong commercial fisherman ... a production operator in the oil fields of Alaska's North Slope ... a proud member of the United Steel Workers' Union ... and world champion snow machine racer.
Throw in his Yup'ik Eskimo ancestry, and it all makes for quite a package.
We met in high school, and two decades and five children later he's still my guy. My Mom and Dad both worked at the elementary school in our small town.
And among the many things I owe them is one simple lesson: that this is America, and every woman can walk through every door of opportunity.
My parents are here tonight, and I am so proud to be the daughter of Chuck and Sally Heath. Long ago, a young farmer and haberdasher from Missouri followed an unlikely path to the vice presidency.
A writer observed: "We grow good people in our small towns, with honesty, sincerity, and dignity." I know just the kind of people that writer had in mind when he praised Harry Truman.
I grew up with those people.
They are the ones who do some of the hardest work in America ... who grow our food, run our factories, and fight our wars.
They love their country, in good times and bad, and they're always proud of America. I had the privilege of living most of my life in a small town.
I was just your average hockey mom, and signed up for the PTA because I wanted to make my kids' public education better.
When I ran for city council, I didn't need focus groups and voter profiles because I knew those voters, and knew their families, too.
Before I became governor of the great state of Alaska, I was mayor of my hometown.
And since our opponents in this presidential election seem to look down on that experience, let me explain to them what the job involves.
I guess a small-town mayor is sort of like a "community organizer," except that you have actual responsibilities. I might add that in small towns, we don't quite know what to make of a candidate who lavishes praise on working people when they are listening, and then talks about how bitterly they cling to their religion and guns when those people aren't listening.
We tend to prefer candidates who don't talk about us one way in Scranton and another way in San Francisco.
As for my running mate, you can be certain that wherever he goes, and whoever is listening, John McCain is the same man. I'm not a member of the permanent political establishment.
And I've learned quickly, these past few days, that if you're not a member in good standing of the Washington elite, then some in the media consider a candidate unqualified for that reason alone.
But here's a little news flash for all those reporters and commentators: I'm not going to Washington to seek their good opinion — I'm going to Washington to serve the people of this country. Americans expect us to go to Washington for the right reasons, and not just to mingle with the right people.
Politics isn't just a game of clashing parties and competing interests.
The right reason is to challenge the status quo, to serve the common good, and to leave this nation better than we found it.
No one expects us to agree on everything.
But we are expected to govern with integrity, good will, clear convictions, and ... a servant's heart.
I pledge to all Americans that I will carry myself in this spirit as vice president of the United States. This was the spirit that brought me to the governor's office, when I took on the old politics as usual in Juneau ... when I stood up to the special interests, the lobbyists, big oil companies, and the good ol' boys network.
Sudden and relentless reform never sits well with entrenched interests and power brokers. That's why true reform is so hard to achieve.
But with the support of the citizens of Alaska, we shook things up.
And in short order we put the government of our state back on the side of the people.
I came to office promising major ethics reform, to end the culture of self-dealing. And today, that ethics reform is the law.
While I was at it, I got rid of a few things in the governor's office that I didn't believe our citizens should have to pay for.
That luxury jet was over the top. I put it on eBay.
I also drive myself to work.
And I thought we could muddle through without the governor's personal chef — although I've got to admit that sometimes my kids sure miss her. I came to office promising to control spending — by request if possible and by veto if necessary.
Senator McCain also promises to use the power of veto in defense of the public interest — and as a chief executive, I can assure you it works.
Our state budget is under control.
We have a surplus.
And I have protected the taxpayers by vetoing wasteful spending: nearly half a billion dollars in vetoes.
I suspended the state fuel tax, and championed reform to end the abuses of earmark spending by Congress.
I told the Congress "thanks, but no thanks," for that Bridge to Nowhere.
If our state wanted a bridge, we'd build it ourselves. When oil and gas prices went up dramatically, and filled up the state treasury, I sent a large share of that revenue back where it belonged — directly to the people of Alaska.
And despite fierce opposition from oil company lobbyists, who kind of liked things the way they were, we broke their monopoly on power and resources.
As governor, I insisted on competition and basic fairness to end their control of our state and return it to the people.
I fought to bring about the largest private-sector infrastructure project in North American history.
And when that deal was struck, we began a nearly forty billion dollar natural gas pipeline to help lead America to energy independence.
That pipeline, when the last section is laid and its valves are opened, will lead America one step farther away from dependence on dangerous foreign powers that do not have our interests at heart.
The stakes for our nation could not be higher.
When a hurricane strikes in the Gulf of Mexico, this country should not be so dependent on imported oil that we are forced to draw from our Strategic Petroleum Reserve.
And families cannot throw away more and more of their paychecks on gas and heating oil.
With Russia wanting to control a vital pipeline in the Caucasus, and to divide and intimidate our European allies by using energy as a weapon, we cannot leave ourselves at the mercy of foreign suppliers.
To confront the threat that Iran might seek to cut off nearly a fifth of world energy supplies ... or that terrorists might strike again at the Abqaiq facility in Saudi Arabia ... or that Venezuela might shut off its oil deliveries ... we Americans need to produce more of our own oil and gas.
And take it from a gal who knows the North Slope of Alaska: we've got lots of both.
Our opponents say, again and again, that drilling will not solve all of America's energy problems — as if we all didn't know that already.
But the fact that drilling won't solve every problem is no excuse to do nothing at all.
Starting in January, in a McCain-Palin administration, we're going to lay more pipelines ... build more new-clear plants ... create jobs with clean coal ... and move forward on solar, wind, geothermal and other alternative sources.
We need American energy resources, brought to you by American ingenuity, and produced by American workers. I've noticed a pattern with our opponent.
Maybe you have, too.
We've all heard his dramatic speeches before devoted followers.
And there is much to like and admire about our opponent.
But listening to him speak, it's easy to forget that this is a man who has authored two memoirs but not a single major law or reform — not even in the state Senate.
This is a man who can give an entire speech about the wars America is fighting, and never use the word "victory" except when he's talking about his own campaign. But when the cloud of rhetoric has passed ... when the roar of the crowd fades away ... when the stadium lights go out, and those Styrofoam Greek columns are hauled back to some studio lot - what exactly is our opponent's plan? What does he actually seek to accomplish, after he's done turning back the waters and healing the planet? The answer is to make government bigger ... take more of your money ... give you more orders from Washington ... and to reduce the strength of America in a dangerous world. America needs more energy ... our opponent is against producing it.
Victory in Iraq is finally in sight ... he wants to forfeit.
Terrorist states are seeking new-clear weapons without delay ... he wants to meet them without preconditions.
Al-Qaida terrorists still plot to inflict catastrophic harm on America ... he's worried that someone won't read them their rights? Government is too big ... he wants to grow it.
Congress spends too much ... he promises more.
Taxes are too high ... he wants to raise them. His tax increases are the fine print in his economic plan, and let me be specific.
The Democratic nominee for president supports plans to raise income taxes ... raise payroll taxes ... raise investment income taxes ... raise the death tax ... raise business taxes ... and increase the tax burden on the American people by hundreds of billions of dollars. My sister Heather and her husband have just built a service station that's now opened for business — like millions of others who run small businesses.
How are they going to be any better off if taxes go up? Or maybe you're trying to keep your job at a plant in Michigan or Ohio ... or create jobs with clean coal from Pennsylvania or West Virginia ... or keep a small farm in the family right here in Minnesota.
How are you going to be better off if our opponent adds a massive tax burden to the American economy? Here's how I look at the choice Americans face in this election.
In politics, there are some candidates who use change to promote their careers.
And then there are those, like John McCain, who use their careers to promote change.
They're the ones whose names appear on laws and landmark reforms, not just on buttons and banners, or on self-designed presidential seals.
Among politicians, there is the idealism of high-flown speechmaking, in which crowds are stirringly summoned to support great things.
And then there is the idealism of those leaders, like John McCain, who actually do great things. They're the ones who are good for more than talk ... the ones we have always been able to count on to serve and defend America. Senator McCain's record of actual achievement and reform helps explain why so many special interests, lobbyists, and comfortable committee chairmen in Congress have fought the prospect of a McCain presidency — from the primary election of 2000 to this very day.
Our nominee doesn't run with the Washington herd.
He's a man who's there to serve his country, and not just his party.
A leader who's not looking for a fight, but is not afraid of one either. Harry Reid, the Majority Leader of the current do-nothing Senate, not long ago summed up his feelings about our nominee.
He said, quote, "I can't stand John McCain." Ladies and gentlemen, perhaps no accolade we hear this week is better proof that we've chosen the right man. Clearly what the Majority Leader was driving at is that he can't stand up to John McCain. That is only one more reason to take the maverick of the Senate and put him in the White House. My fellow citizens, the American presidency is not supposed to be a journey of "personal discovery." This world of threats and dangers is not just a community, and it doesn't just need an organizer.
And though both Senator Obama and Senator Biden have been going on lately about how they are always, quote, "fighting for you," let us face the matter squarely.
There is only one man in this election who has ever really fought for you ... in places where winning means survival and defeat means death ... and that man is John McCain. In our day, politicians have readily shared much lesser tales of adversity than the nightmare world in which this man, and others equally brave, served and suffered for their country.
It's a long way from the fear and pain and squalor of a six-by-four cell in Hanoi to the Oval Office.
But if Senator McCain is elected president, that is the journey he will have made.
It's the journey of an upright and honorable man — the kind of fellow whose name you will find on war memorials in small towns across this country, only he was among those who came home.
To the most powerful office on earth, he would bring the compassion that comes from having once been powerless ... the wisdom that comes even to the captives, by the grace of God ... the special confidence of those who have seen evil, and seen how evil is overcome. A fellow prisoner of war, a man named Tom Moe of Lancaster, Ohio, recalls looking through a pinhole in his cell door as Lieutenant Commander John McCain was led down the hallway, by the guards, day after day.
As the story is told, "When McCain shuffled back from torturous interrogations, he would turn toward Moe's door and flash a grin and thumbs up" — as if to say, "We're going to pull through this." My fellow Americans, that is the kind of man America needs to see us through these next four years.
For a season, a gifted speaker can inspire with his words.
For a lifetime, John McCain has inspired with his deeds.
If character is the measure in this election ... and hope the theme ... and change the goal we share, then I ask you to join our cause. Join our cause and help America elect a great man as the next president of the United States.
Thank you all, and may God bless America.

Pretty Blue eyes...

2008-08-14T12:13:00.000-04:00

Picture Update, words later

2008-08-14T12:09:00.000-04:00

2008-08-14T12:07:00.000-04:00

Nothing much

2008-07-16T14:06:00.003-04:00

So it turns out we finally got offered a house. FINALLY!! Hopefully we should have a tour with the housing office by the end of the week. I say hopefully because... IT is a brand new house and it isn't finished just yet. Yeah, you read that right...BRAND NEW!! Whooot Whooot!! This will be the nicest house we have ever lived in and that includes the house we currently own in Texas. I can't wait to move in it... Keith and I have allot of plans but of course once we get our things is when we can really see how things should go. I am excited... We have never really cared about decorating or making things our own while in base housing so we are thrilled.

We drove all over the Island this past weekend. It was very nice even though Olivia didn't really enjoy it and Em kept asking "Are we there yet?" She is very much like her father and didn't understand the concept of driving without having an end result. She just couldn't sit back and enjoy the view!! LOL Sometimes Keith gets annoyed with her and what she is doing at the moment or how she is acting and I look at him like "Really? Because that is EXACTLY how you are!"
Anyway, it was a nice drive. Some times I wonder what Keith is thinking when he tells me things. When we were driving around the North Shore area Keith felt the need to tell me to "Not take the kids to that area by myself" Really? So, I shouldn't try to take an infant and my 4 year old to a beach alone where it is well known for it huge waves and strong currents? News flash, I am not going to any beach alone with two kids (one being a baby) alone... yeah that sounds like great fun and real safe too... Maybe I should just get a surf board and teach Oli early... the North Shore sounds like a perfect place to start... *Insert Eye Roll*

So I started Oli on solid food. She didn't take to the cereal at first. I guess being it was Rice cereal and it has no flavor I can't say I blame her. Once I added a bit of sweet potato to it though she started opening her mouth like a little birdy. Now she grunts at me if I don't get that damn spoon in her mouth the second she has swallowed. She eats like a pig and still nurses every 3-4 hours if not more!! She is a little chunk! I can't wait until we get her room set up and she has a room and a bed of her own finally. Her own things, her own space. She has no idea what that is like. I feel like Em had so much more and she did at that age. I feel like a bad mother to Oli for not giving her the same things Em had. I finally got her a Jumper at Toys R Us the other day. It the little galloping horse Jumper and makes these really cute noises. She loves it!!I told Keith I didn't care that we were still in TLF, she needed something of her own and I wanted her to have it. Once we move I have a feeling I am going to be making it up to her allot more!!

Em is doing well. I don't think many kids at her age could handle everything is has been going through lately. I will be happy for her once she has her bed and toys again. She knows we should get a house soon and all her toys. She has been a trooper this past year and endured everything very well. God knows there has been a ton of changes in her life. I was asking about Pre-school in the area and don't think we will be able to afford one here as they are about 600 bucks a month!! I am going to look into other things for her like the day care on base for a couple days a week and maybe some dance classes. Something to keep her mind busy and still have social access with her peers.

So that is about all right now I guess. The kiddos should be waking up soon.

Until later...

Color me RED

2008-07-11T20:58:00.003-04:00

This morning when Em and I went to the office to get breakfast we had an interesting conversation. She wanted to know if I could buy her another paint book set. You know those little books that come with the water paints on the cover? So I told her that I didn't have any money at the moment and her reply was " Mommy you have those cards". "Yes I do" I told her, "but I have to still pay with money even when I use those cards" She then paused and looked up at me and said, " I don't know Mommy, all I know is I have a chocolate donut and it doesn't have any sprinkles on it"

I thought that was pretty stink'in funny!!

Nothing going on today. Thank God it's Friday and Keith has the weekend off so I can leave this room!! LOL We have plans to have dinner with two couples this weekend. I am nervous. I hate meeting new people and trying to come up with conversation. I am not really a social butterfly but at least we all have kids so that is something to always talk about.

So the other night we got a phone call on the hotel room phone which has not happened since we got here so it was a bit strange. So I pick it up and it's some guy asking me if I own a black Mustang and which I reply yes, thinking Keith needed to move the car for the office personnel for whatever reason. This guy on the phone then tells me that he HIT Keith's car while he was backing up. So, I try not to freak out on the phone and just say okay, "I'll be right there". I hung up and tried to calmly tell Keith about his "baby". Keith freaks the hell out and is spitting and sputtering... swearing like crazy... He gets dressed and we start arguing and yelling at each other (Cause we are both GREAT under pressure), and I stay with the kids in room while he leaves to deal with the guy and the Mustang. Next thing I know Keith opens the door and he is BEAT RED. He tells me the whole back end is totalled and doesn't know how this "dumb ass fucked his car up that much", so he brought the guy back to "apologize" me. Then this guy steps out from behind Keith and it turns out he is a Gunny that Keith used to work with in Iwakuni. I had not seen this person in 10 years... Most people say things like "Wow, it's nice to see you, how have you been" Not me people... I pointed at him and yelled "FUCK YOU"!!! Yup, classy, I know!! So then I calmed down and we all talked and caught up... I guess you can say that both Keith and I were a bit happy the car wasn't Fucked up...

So, that about sums it up for now... I miss my camera. And my bed... and my couch. And my pain in the ass dogs. (Who are still at my parent's house and will be until Sept because of the Quarantine process) Lucky them huh?

Later

Aloha

2008-07-09T12:36:00.009-04:00

Or Howdy as I usually say...

Made it to Hawaii. Things have been going fine so far. Getting here was a pain in the royal ass though. For three days we had packers and movers in the house in NC. I am glad we don't have to actually do the packing but trying to take care of a baby and a bored 4 year old during that time period was a bit difficult. After everything was gone we moved into temporary housing on base for 10 days before we flew. Now we have been at this base's temporary housing for just over a week. Neither place has an oven. So for over two weeks we have been living on microwavable meals and fast food. You could say I am sick of it. We have gone out to a few nice restaurants since coming here but let's face it, you can only do that so much before going broke. I am dying for a home-made meal. It's still undermined as to when we will have a house so who knows when that will be. This room though isn't too bad. We have the Internet and a normal amount of TV stations to watch, and there is a small playground just outside of our room. There is also a 7 Day store right across the street as well which works out since we only have one car at the moment. (Mine should be on a boat by now some place on the Pacific)

Aside from Em being totally bored out of her mind while Keith is at work (She doesn't have any toys and we are pretty much confined to the room during work days), we are doing good. It will be wonderful to have a house again and our things. It has only been two weeks (almost 3),but living out of suitcases for that long and not eating real healthy kind of stinks. I just want to get settled now that we are here and back into a routine. I have to say though that we are doing really well for having 4 people share a small room together. Em is bouncing off the walls like a bird on crack but I can't blame her for that. God must of determined that I need some extra help and has been over loading me with patience which isn't normal for me. I am not saying I don't have my moments but knowing she is doing well for a 4 year old with no toys and no friends at the moment is keeping me from flipping out. I feel badly for her and I think she is doing pretty good actually dealing with it. We just have to remind her to calm down during the day...

Now as far as Hawaii goes (Which is actually Hawai'i people), from what I have seen so far I like it. The mountains (AKA Volcanoes) are beautiful. We went to the beach last weekend and Keith found an area which is shaded and has a such a low tide you can walk out as far as the eye can see. So it was great for us. Oli slept in the nice cool shaded breeze and Em played safely in the water while Keith snorkeled. The water is crystal clear and feels like bath water. (My big toe was really all that made it in) The Island has all that we will ever need... It has a HUGE tourist area in Honolulu where there are tons of stores to shop. The food is amazing here. I don't know if it's because we just came from a small country town or what but I just can't get over the taste of the food, it's so yummy. There are a few malls to shop here and even carry things I used to love to look at in the 100 Yen store in Japan. (Yes people there are things I DO miss about Japan, just not the housing there or lack of quaility of life) Speaking of the Japan thing... You can see the Japanese influence all over the Island and there is even Japanese TV shows on with subtitles. I watch it for some reason... I guess because it's all I had in Japan at times to watch so it just seems natural again to watch it here... now though at least I know what they are saying. They have authentic Japanese food here, not the crap they try to sell as Japanese food back in mainland. I have to say this because I do believe that somewhere along the line people got to thinking that I didn't like the Japanese PEOPLE which isn't the case. I didn't like (okay, hated), the way we had to live there. When you go from having everything at your finger tips to virtually having nothing or not even something related to what you are used to ... it is difficult. And, yes, I know that means I am spoiled but we all are as Americans and I can guarantee that if you had to live like Keith and I did there (not go on vacation for a few days), you would not have been happy about it either. Anyway, I just don't want people to act like they are surprised that I missed some Japanese things because after all I lived there for 3 years and of course some things I would miss. But for the most part I was thrilled to get out of there. Here though ,I can be a spoiled American and enjoy some of the Japanese things that I actually did miss once I left. However, now I can have these things AND will also have my air conditioner, heat, a fridge (Not a HOLE in the ground to store food in my kitchen), no maggots in my food, a phone, TV stations that do not play "Mr Belvader" 4 times a day, (The same episode for shit's sake), (And for a whole year we did not get ANY TV or have a phone at ALL), and now we access to food that I actually know what it is. I also do not have to point at pictures to communicate with people ... AND that is just a few things to give you an example... if you want more email me because I have compiled a list that goes on for three years. (For those of you in the military and have done a tour in Owkinawa, I KNOW you have no clue what I am talking about, trust me.)

So anyway, Hawaii... Yeah I like it! I think the girls are going to like it. Emily loves going to the beach so that is a plus. There is allot here to do of course and lots of shopping. Having a variety of bases to go to is also great. The Marine Corps doesn't exactly spend it's money on nice Commissaries or Exchanges since they don't have much money to begin with as far as branches of military go... (They kind of spend their money on bullets or repairing used gear over and over), so to be able to go to the Navy or Air Force base which have HUGE stores is wonderful. I am also looking forward to getting my camera and taking some pictures. All in all it's going to be nice to call this place home.

The girls are good. Like I said Em is a bit bored but who can blame her? Oli is good. Getting bigger and bigger. I started her on solid food which she didn't take to right away. By the third time of trying though she started grunting at me for more and opening her mouth like a little birdy waiting for the spoon. Now she eats like a champ and is doing well with it. She is also still Breast Feeding really well so it is working out. IF she wasn't BFing as good I would stop with the solids but it isn't the case at the moment. She is so different than Em ever was as a baby and has her own little personality. She is much more calm and patient than Em and likes to snuggle a lot more. Em was happy to be on her own where Oli is happier being held but she is fine if you put her down and have to take care of things. She only cries if she wants you or is hungry... It's been a blessing during this period of time. She is such a good baby. Both girls actually have been wonderful during the move and Keith and I know how lucky we have been because of it. Between all the trips to NY and back to NC and then the move... then the 9 hour flight, and now having not much to do... well they are handling it really well. Em was asking about her toys last night... She misses them and she knows that her new bed should also be here soon. She is anxious for it all to get here, the same with Keith and I! Oli rolled over a few times but has since forgot that she can do it. I am just enjoying her being a small baby still so that is fine with me. I have learned to enjoy each day now which is so different than how I was with Em. I was obsessed with her obtaining each milestone, now she is 4 years old and I feel like I missed her being a baby because of it.

Anyway, both girls are awake now and I have to go be Mommy. Hope everyone is doing well and I will try and be better about updating. Hopefully we will get a house soon and my camera to follow so I can share some pictures. Until later...

My Cutie Pies

2008-06-05T11:51:00.000-04:00

Let's see if this works

2008-06-05T07:40:00.003-04:00

Kari posted a video the other day and I have been wanting to post this one I did but for some reason it hasn't been working. Since she posted hers I thought I would try it again and see if it actually works this time.

Anyway, if it does it is a video of some pictures of the time Em and I were in NY. Normally most military brats (A common name for military children for those who don't know,LOL), do not get to spend much time with family. Even though it sucked having Keith gone for so long the positive in it was Emily having that time to bond with all of her family. The memories she will have will carry her through our tour in Hawaii knowing what she has to come back to. We could not have done this last deployment without our family. Having everyone surround Emily and take her under their wing, help me with my pregnancy, and being home through all the holidays was a blessing. We are truly blessed and thankful to have such a wonderful family...

Sami

2008-06-01T13:28:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday Sami Girl! We love you oh so much and miss you dearly!!! I CAN NOT believe that you are one year old now!!! That went way too quickly...

I hope you have a great birthday party today and a wonderful day on your birthday tomorrow. You are a beautiful little girl inside and out with one of the prettiest smiles I have ever seen. I adore you and wish you a healthy and happy second year of life.

Love you always,

Your Aunt Julie

PS... I can't wait to hear about all the adventures those little feet are going to take you on this year. Have fun and tell Mommy to send me lots of pictures.

To My Dad

2008-05-30T10:59:00.000-04:00

Congrats to my Dad who worked his last and final day today and offically starts his retirement tomorrow!!

May you have a healthy and happy retirement! I hope you have many a happy afternoon in your "Mr. Sleepy Chair" only without all the toys that Emily used to pile on top of you!

I love you!!

Your Bugger

Love These

2008-05-22T07:51:00.000-04:00

My Dad took these in NY. I laugh every time I look at them! I think they truly show Emily's personality and I guess that is the reason for me liking them so much. I think what is even funnier is that she normal does "ham it up" for the camera but it's usually just her face that shows it. In these pictures she used her whole body which to tell you the truth I think I should be a little concerned that she really is turning into a little model. It's funny to me that she put that much thought into how she wanted to look!

Did I tell you that we bought her a kid's camera for her birthday? The girl can take some really good pictures if she wants to. I am pretty impressed with her photography skills. She loves taking pictures and I enjoy looking at things from her perspective.

Anyway, just wanted to share...

Yeah Me

2008-05-19T06:37:00.003-04:00

Do you know where your children are? I do, mine are in bed. Thank God! I don't care if it's 6am and I only slept a couple hours at a time last night. Do you know why? I'll tell ya... Because I can sit here in peace in quiet and enjoy a nice HOT cup of coffee... slowly. Not the normal slap it down in two seconds while it burns the back of my throat all the while standing up to drink it. I swear if somebody wakes these kids before I finish this coffee it's grounds for a bitch slap.

Yesterday was one of THOSE days that you have as a mother with an infant. Not the cuddly sweet day but the day where they never let you put them down even to take a piss. The kind of day where they haven't napped all day, their eyes are beat red, and they a big wrinkle in between their brow from frowning so much... the kind of day that when you FINALLY think they might sleep somebody with a big mouth wakes them up two seconds later? Where you can't even lay them down alone without them screaming bloody murder? I hate those days... So this is the morning after that day and Keith just went to work and both kiddos are sleeping. The coffee is still nice and hot and I am hoping that my arms get a break today along with being able to shower later. I guess I could do it now but you have to weigh your priorities with an infant. Coffee is numero uno...

People keep saying to me "Julie, why don't you write in your blog?" Well... let's see... I HAVE A BABY ONLY A FEW WEEKS OLD THAT NEVER SLEEPS! I AM BREAST FEEDING AND SHE NEVER WANTS TO BE ON HER OWN. UNLESS I GROW A THIRD ARM (WHICH I WOULD REALLY LOVE TO HAPPEN BY THE WAY), I CAN'T TYPE WITH HER HANGING FROM MY BOOBS ALL DAY. And yes, it is literally all day now because we just found out (Well, I knew it but nobody took my seriously because apparently every mother knows best except for me.), that she has acid reflux. So, she eats, throws up, and wants to eat again. I can no longer feel my boobs people... You could hook a vacuum cleaner hose up to my boob and I swear I wouldn't be able to feel it.
On the rare occasion she naps alone or what have you I have to do this little thing called "Getting ready to move to Hawaii". Oh yeah, I also have a four year old who is craving my attention and doesn't EVER stop talking to me. EVER!!!! (Remind me why she was in speech Therapy for a year and why I was so worried about her never talking because I am not even sure she is getting enough oxygen during the day from flapping her lips so much) Then there is the husband who is back after 7 months and now after coming back from NY I have to take care of a house. (Where is Grandma and Grandpa when you need them?) Let's not even talk about how we left NY a week ago and I am still trying to catch up on laundry from then. I HATE laundry... Let's face it, THAT is really the punishment brought on women for biting into the apple....

So. That brings everyone up to speed. No, I am not grumpy, just busy and being blunt about it. I barely have enough time for everyone in this family that is craving something from me let alone have time for myself or outside of this family of 4 at the moment. Thank God I bought a new phone that has a text pad so I can at least text people at times. Of course I need to remember to get my phone out the diaper bag and keep it charged to do so.

In case you were wondering, we are leaving NC for good at the end of June. I just want the movers to come and get everything and get going with it. I have already started putting toys in bins and organizing them so it's easier to unpack them. We had a garage sale this past weekend and sold the last of our crap that we really didn't want to move with. We also bought Emily a new bedroom set and Olivia a crib for the new house. So, we have made some preparations but I hate having everything just hanging over our heads and waiting. I am not really looking forward to the 15 hour plane ride either. I think Em will be fine and we plan on buying her a hand held gaming system either from Vtech or Leapster to keep her busy. (Anyone know which is better?) It's the baby I am worried about. I don't want our kid to be "that" kid on the plane that won't stop crying and driving everyone nuts. I guess I could keep her on the boob the whole time but I am not sure they won't shrivel up and fall off after 15 hours.

I am so not that mother either that doesn't mind whipping her tits out in public to nurse either. I won't do it. I will go to the car where I have a bit of privacy to do it. Even then I have to be in an area where people are not walking by the car. Keith keeps saying that I should just do it (Like while we are in a restaurant or something like that) Ummm nooooo.... why don't you walk around with your zipper undone and your balls hanging out if it's nothing major? I know I am feeding my kid and all and MOST people understand this but people still stare Or they do that look like they are trying not to. I don't like it. And here it's even more uncomfortable... there is no way I would do it in public here in a Marine Corps town. Yeah, like I would be real comfortable with a bunch of 18 year old Jarheads snickering with each other over the old lady with her shit hanging out... no thanks....

Speaking of the baby. She is great. She is such a chunk compared to how Em was as a baby. She is starting to sleep in 3-4 hour intervals at night except early mornings. She just started her acid reflux medicine a couple of days ago and hopefully that will help her eat better and feel better. People ask me all the time who I think she looks like... she looks like her Aunt Kristin (My sister), and she has her Uncle Ian's (Keith's brother), light blonde hair coming in. So, she doesn't look like Keith or I but she does look like our family at least! She is pretty much a good baby. She has her moments but now that she is sleeping a bit more I can deal with them better. What is harder on me is not having time to give Em more attention. She is awesome though at not being jealous and helping. She is a great helper. Like last night Keith and I were trying to clean up after dinner and Olivia kept crying and Emily would go to her and put the pacifier in her mouth and talk to her. She is really sweet to her. The sweetest is though that she always calls Olivia "My Baby". I am not so sure if a few months from now she is going to enjoy sharing her toys but at the moment all is well in that department.

Well, I have to go and actually do the mom thing now. The little one is awake and Em just strolled down the hallway, walked into the kitchen and grabbed a left over biscuit from last night's dinner. Guess I don't have to worry about breakfast this morning...LOL

Later people.

Home

2008-04-09T21:59:00.000-04:00

Dismissed

2008-03-31T19:01:00.003-04:00

Keith and I have never been that over romantic mushy couple. Not when we were "dating" (People, if you count 20 days of knowing each other "dating" before you get married). Keith and I have always been the kind of couple that can joke around together, argue and talk things out, and hang out as best friends would do. Being romantic to us is grabbing some food, head home for the couch, and curling up and watching either a movie or favorite TV show together. We just simply enjoy each other's company and usually prefer it over anyone elses. In fact we often joke around and say that we are hermits who would much rather live in an underground cave together.

I am not saying that we always get along. We have our moments and when we do it is usually heated followed by a vocabulary that would embarrass his troops. We work it though and that is all that matters.

Through the 13 + years that we have been married we have lived in many places and been through allot. Living in Japan was hell and it only made us stronger as a couple. I think we both learned that no matter where we lived, how little we had, and how badly things seemed to be that as long as we were healthy and had each other that that is what matter most. We know a lot of couples that didn't make it while living there... We know allot of couples period that haven't made it in the military together. We seem to be one of the old farts now in the Marine Corps that have managed to stay married.

We made it through 10 years of infertility... We decided together to stop everything and we were there for each other through that grief and heart ache. We moved on together. When we found out I was pregnant we knew we were blessed and we were happy together. When I got sick Keith held me up through one of the most difficult times in my life. He was my strength and he got me to smile when I didn't think I had anything to smile about. When we found out that Emily had a severe brain bleed we cried together, held each other, and together we decided she would make it and we would be her strength... together.
When I got pregnant with Olivia it was the first time in our marriage that we would have to do something major separate. He would not be able to see my belly grow, hear her heart beat for the first time or see his youngest be born. Yet through the miles he was there with me waiting and rejoicing in her birth and in her being healthy.

We have been through many deployments together and through two tours in Iraq. I can not explain to you the emotions of seeing your spouse after such a long period of time. Like I said, we have never been that mushy love sick couple... but the emotions that take over with him coming home are indescribable. It is like nothing I have ever felt... Many other spouses have said this as well. It is something that you have to experience yourself to know exactly what I mean. It is a cross between relief, joy,excitment, pride, and impatience. Take all of those and wrap them up together and times it by 10 and you kind of have it.

Keith is coming home this weekend. I will see him for the first time in over 7 months once again. During this time he has missed 7 months of Emily's life and all that entails that. He missed Halloween, Turkey Day, our Anniversary, Christmas, New Years, Valentines, and his youngest daughter's entire pregnancy and birth. It is time and events that he can never get back or can never experience no matter how many pictures he looks at. Once again we did this together. No matter what we knew that through it all we had each other, our marriage, and our children. We both had bad days, hard days, sad times and we did our best to be there for each other through it all... When I see him get off that bus and make eye contact for the first time there is a sense of relief knowing that not only he is safe but all the burdens and hardships of the past 7 months are now over. There is excitement, tears joy and we will finally be a family once again. Together.

I think the one thing I have learned repeatedly over every deployment is that I don't "need" Keith in my life but I want him there... I didn't need him to help me with Em, I didn't need him through the holidays or even to give birth. I sure did want him there though every step of the way and I know he wanted us as well.

Finally, I think for those of you that have no idea what it is like to see your Marine or military spouse for the first time in months after coming back from a war zone... I leave you with this song. If you listen to the words it pretty much describes in detail the emotions one has. It IS truly magical as the song says when they get off that bus and then you hear the long awaited command "dismissed" and see the flood of cammies running towards their family. I play it about 100 times a day now for Emily and I... and every time I think of Keith coming home and seeing him for the first time knowing he is breathing, safe, and knowing that everything we have been through the past few months is finally over...and we can "just be".

Thanks to everyone who showed their support and as always God Bless America and our Marines...

My Girls

2008-03-29T12:16:00.000-04:00

How is it going?

2008-03-22T11:00:00.003-04:00

That seems to be the question I hear almost daily from people so I will go ahead an answer it for everyone...

Not too shabby I guess for just having surgery and dealing with a newborn, a stubborn almost 4 year old and a husband who is coming home from Iraq in days and wants me to make a 13 hour drive to get him. (With a newborn, Em, and his mother) Not too shabby?

The surgery was surgery... can't say it was great but it was what I expected. Thankfully it wasn't pushed back and I didn't have to wait around all morning thinking about it. My mother and I got to the hospital for 5:30am and I had the surgery at 8. I won't get into how it took 4 attempts to get an IV in me and how after going through that my mother felt the need to tell me to stop swearing at the nurses.... I am sure they loved me. Anyway, they wheeled me down to OR and when the double doors opened up there were a bunch of people waiting for me. It was creepy because they all were smiling like I was going for a spa treatment. My nerves were kicked into overdrive at that point and I was shaking uncontrollably... People kept asking if I was cold, UMMMM NOOOOOOO, you are about to cut me open, I am a little nervous dumb asses! So then came the dreaded Spinal. I am sitting on the side of the table all hunched over just like in all the baby stories you see on TV. The nurse is trying to be nice and tell me it doesn't hurt. Bullshit! It hurt and it hurt allot you lying bitch! :) Lots of hurtful pressure on my spine and then a strange warm feeling tinkling down my legs... then poof, I can't move them anymore. They layed me down, tied me down like I am Frankenstein and then two doctors come in and I hear "incision 8:09"... Ummm, nothing like knowing you are being cut open and just laying there tied down, trying to concentrate on other things and not vomit. My mother appeared at some point at my side for like 5 minutes exactly until the baby was born at 8:14 then she took off to see her and said screw me....LOL I layed there longer waiting for the nurse to bring her to me and it took almost a damn half hour!!! BASTARDS!! Finally they brought her over and she was wrapped up in a little receiving blanket all pink and pissed off that she had been brought out of her warm little bubble. She looked like a little wrinkly old man, but a cute one and any fears I had of not loving her as much was I would love Em vanished. I don't know if there is such a thing as love at first sight when it comes to meeting your significant other but what I do know is that it rings true when you see your child for the first time. The instant I saw her she was mine and I loved her equal to that of her sister.

I was wheeled down to recovery where I was checked every few minutes and annoyed with questions on how I was feeling... Olivia was in the nursery being checked herself and being made to pass her own set of tests. Finally they brought her to me again and we tried the whole breast feeding thing. Never in my life have so many people not only seen my boobs but they kept being squeezed so tight like they were in a damn vise. I don't think any of those nurses in that hospital ever heard of the word gentle...

I had to beg the nurses to take the IV out of my arm and catheter out later ... They wanted me to have all that shit on me for another 12 hours and as soon as I wasn't "paralyzed" anymore I promised them I could take a pee on my own without falling over. The day nurse wasn't buying it but as soon as her replacement came in I tried again on her and she bought it. She took everything out for me except the IV in case the doctor ordered something but it wasn't hooked up to anything, it was just taped in my arm. She brought me to the bathroom to "prove I could pee" and I don't know about you but I can't exactly pee in front of an audience so she threatened to put everything back in... that did the trick and I was never so happy to go pee in my life. There was no way in hell I wanted another pissing bag hooked up to for another 12 hours... I didn't care if I just got cut open, I was going to make the walk to bathroom if it friggin killed me!!

I spent three nights in the hospital but it was supposed to be 4. On the third day I begged (again) to be bailed out and on the nurse did up the paperwork for the doctor to sign. That is the only nurse I really liked there.... When I got home I was sore and tired and worried that breast feeding was natural for other mothers and not myself. I almost gave up... But now it is working out well and Olivia has gained a pound since we have been home. She is a piggy... and my boobs and sore as hell from her chomping on them !!!

So, that is how the hospital went... Not so much fun. Everyone keeps asking how Em is with Olivia. She is awesome! I have not seen a jealous bone in her body. I know it's early but so far so good. She is a great helper and gives Olivia kisses without anyone asking her... She calls her sister "my baby" and is very guarded of her as well. I am really proud of her for being so mature and such a good little helper. I know it could be a horrible experience and I am grateful that so far we have not had to deal with that.

Keith was sent pictures within hours of Olivia's birth. Neither of us feel that she looks like either of us. I see Em's expressions at times but as far as looks go I don't think they look too much alike either. Em has dirty blonde hair with big dark brown eyes and Olivia is very fair haired (you can't even see her eye lashes they are so white), and I am pretty sure her eyes are staying blue. Em has her father's facial bone structure with the chiseled jaw line and Olivia has a fat round face with big cheeks (okay so maybe that is my facial structure)... But at times I can see how they look like sisters...

As far as me goes... Well, the day before my surgery I was finally diagnosed with Pre-Eclampsia again. My blood pressure had been going up for a few weeks and finally the day before they found proteins in my urine. At that point everyone was glad they moved my CSection up early. I once again was swollen beyond normal recognition and already lost 25 pounds of just water weight since I gave birth. Let's just say it wasn't pretty people.... I am doing better though and feel more like a human being and not a marsh mellow...Now I just feel like a milk machine.

So that is pretty much the whole birth drama. It's strange still to think that I have two kids. I look in the back seat of my car and see two car seats and two little faces... It was too long ago Keith and I were told that we would never have kids. Now we had to take measures to make sure we don't have anymore. We are content and blessed to have our two girls. We never imagined that we would have one let alone two beautiful healthy little girls to raise and love. Yes, there are moments of not sleeping and feeling like you are going crazy from lack of sleep, chaos,crying, and temper tantrums galore... But the little kisses and hugs and moments of kindness along with snuggles all make up for that. I am kind of sad in a way that I will never have a little one growing inside of me again but there are no regrets. My body has gotten sick twice being pregnant and I don't want to gamble again with yet another life. We were extremely lucky with Emily and to go full term with Olivia is more than what Keith and I ever expected or imagined would happen. Pushing 40 I don't think my body can take it anymore as well... It's time to enjoy the ones we have an concentrate on them. There is still a twinge of grief though as it is so fresh but with that is the reminder of how fast they grow and to enjoy all that we have.

So, Keith is coming back from Iraq in a matter of days now, not weeks. It is odd to think that. I have been concentrating so much on being pregnant and giving birth that I almost forgot he was coming home not long after. I am driving down to NC to get him with both girls and his mom to help me with them as she can not drive. So, let's pray that I am not sleep deprived and can handle all the driving myself. I think we are going to have to spend the night on the road although I almost don't want to. I want to just get it the hell over with. I guess it all depends... I am going to have to make allot of stops to nurse and take care of Em's needs so it's going to be an extremely long drive either way. We will be in NC for a few days upon Keith's homecoming. I know it's going to be strange for him to come home to a whole new person in his family... It's still strange for me to have Olivia and I gave birth to her! Luckily with Keith coming home this time we both know it's for good as he has orders for Hawaii and at that duty station he won't be going any place. It will be good to know it is a permanent homecoming and not have another deployment hanging over our heads to worry about months from now. Now we can raise our girls together and he won't miss gaps of their lives like he did with Emily twice now.

Speaking of Hawaii... still trying to adjust to thinking about living there. Most would say "what the hell are you crazy, it's Hawaii!!" Yeah, for some reason I keep equating it to Japan in my head so I have yet to get too excited about it. That and It's going to be a pain in the ass to move two kids, two dogs, and two cars there... That's allot of planning, preparation, organization, and above all STRESS people!!! I will be glad when we are all settled and exploring our new home. I will make sure and take lots of pictures for you, especially when it's still 80 there and you all are having snow storms... wouldn't want you to think I missed it...LOL

So, that about wraps things up for now. I have to go and shower up and get Em ready for the day... It's only the afternoon now so I guess I should get off my ass....

Have a happy Easter and enjoy...

A few more for you

2008-03-17T17:42:00.000-04:00

Olivia Rose

2008-03-14T22:38:00.001-04:00

6 Pounds 15 Ounces and 18 Inches.

2008-03-14T22:33:00.000-04:00

Trying out the Paci

2008-03-14T22:32:00.000-04:00

The Nurse telling Em that she gets to keep her!

2008-03-14T22:30:00.000-04:00

Sisters

Cya soon

2008-03-10T17:08:00.001-04:00

Going to the hospital tomorrow to have the baby! See you in a few days when I post some pictures of our new little girl!!

Have a good one!

Say What?

2008-02-23T09:06:00.003-05:00

There was a time before Keith and I had kids that Keith would make fun of my father for spoiling his girls. My father used to go out of his way for us, and pretty much still does. For instant with myself, I would have a craving for chocolate and my father would run out and get whatever I wanted anytime day or night. For my sister he would make breakfast every morning before school and carry it on a tray up to her room... Things like that, things that Keith swore he would NEVER EVER do!! A couple of months before he left Em came up to him and asked for Ice Cream which in our house is a basic staple for Keith and is always in the freezer. This one particular day though must have been right before payday and we didn't have any at the time. Do you want to know what my husband did? He looked in the freezer for Em, saw that we didn't have any and said to her " We don't have any Em but I will go and buy some for you." I just looked at him in total shock thinking I had heard wrong. But no, off he went to get her ice cream. I hadn't much thought of that afternoon until yesterday. Yesterday Keith told me something rather shocking. Words formed in his mouth and he uttered a complete sentence I never thought would be coming from him. Let me give you a little back ground first... A couple of weeks ago Em and I put a care package together for Keith. It contained some chocolate, money, pictures Em had made him, a little teddy bear with a pink silky blanket that says "It's a girl", a card, and finally a catalog from Kay Jewelers that Emily had drawn circles around particular jewelry that she "wanted Daddy to get her". Notice it wasn't a toy catalog... So anyway, he just got this box two days ago and probably ate all his chocolate in one sitting. Keith and I were talking yesterday about how when he comes home that him and Emily are going to have a "Daddy and me day" and they are going to go to a place called Howe's Caves. Emily went there with his parents a few weeks ago and all she kept telling me was that she had to go with Daddy again when he got home. So, it's something they both have been looking forward to. So anyway, while he is talking about that he brings up the jewelry catalog and tells me that on the way back from Howe's Caves he is going to stop at Kay Jewelers and "LET HER PICK OUT SOMETHING THAT SHE WANTS." Wait a minute, hold on here... Did I just hear what I think I heard? He is going to bring our 4 year old daughter to a jewelry store and let her pick something out? This is coming from the guy that used to make fun of my father "for being a push over" with his girls. Keith goes on to tell me that it's okay, most of the "pink stuff" that she wanted only costs about a couple hundred each "so it's not that bad" People I am at loose for words here, I really am. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think Keith would say such a thing while awake or not drunk.

So I have three weeks until I have my CSection!! If I don't go into labor earlier. I have been having allot of Braxton Hicks, pressure, and all that fun stuff. I wouldn't doubt it if I go a bit earlier than expected. Of course any time now would be fine with me. I seriously want her out. It takes great effort to get any sleep at night or even get comfortable at any time of day. Of course I never carried this far along before so this is all new to me. It may be new but I am done and want her out... Did I mention that I want her out? So, I have the baby's stuff packed but nothing for myself yet. Having to spend 4 days in the hospital does not even sound one bit appealing and I can't even bring myself to think about what I need for that long yet. However, I am excited about finally seeing the baby. I keep watching those baby stories and seeing all those little ones is making me anxious to hold my own. Of course seeing her every two hours in the middle of the night when she first comes homes doesn't sound like much fun but I have been there done that before so I guess I can do it again... Em is also getting super excited about her baby coming. She tells me she is going to wash her and feed her so I am going to hold her to that! LOL

Nothing else is going on. Just getting bigger and more tired and waiting for Olivia to get here along with Keith who should follow about a month or so later. After he comes back we should be in the middle of moving (Although who knows were at this point still), and things will be as crazy as ever. In the meantime I am just trying to keep Em busy during the winter months in NY which is rather difficult and just going through one day at a time. So, until next time people...

If you haven't seen this

2008-02-07T11:05:00.000-05:00

Watch it...

"Oh" She said with a Big smile

2008-01-26T17:20:00.000-05:00

"Look Mommy, It's Daddy" she says.

"Daddy is a Marine" "What are they doing?" She asked.

"The Marines are keeping us safe Emily, just like your Daddy does at Special Work." I answer with pride, for both her and her Daddy...

"Oh!" She says with a big smile.

Kisses and smiles

2008-01-23T21:00:00.000-05:00

Hello, Anyone there?

2008-01-21T09:28:00.000-05:00

Yeah, okay so I suck really bad at this whole Blog thing lately. I just lack any energy to do anything if you really want to know. I felt the need though to come and post about the significance of tomorrow. Tomorrow I will be 31 weeks along in this pregnancy. Tomorrow will be the day that I delivered with Em, the first day of the 31st week. So, after tomorrow I will officially be pregnant longer that I have been before. This baby already weighs more than Em did at that point. Crazy... So far everything is going well. No high blood pressure, no proteins in urine, no spotting, no cramps, no swelling. So far so good... I have all the normal pains like hip pain, back pain, leg cramps, hip pain, hip pain, and did I mention hip pain? My legs hurt from carrying my big ass body around but that is because I am so damn short, it's allot of strain on them shorties.

Right now I am scheduled to deliver in my 39Th week. I am trying not to freak, I mean, it's less than 2 months away now. February is going to be a busy month for me. I have to get the baby's things washed and crap like that. I also have to make Keith's coming home signs since March is going to be a busy month for me. He won't be home until sometime in April but I can't see myself bending over painting after surgery. Not to mention I am sure napping will be more of a priority. I want to do a sign from both the girls, I just can't think of anything original to put on it. I know from past experience that having a lot of words on the sign is not too fun to paint so I want to keep it short and sweet... I just can't think of the sweet part.

Speaking of Keith, He is good. Busy but good. He has not had a day off since he has been there and he works 14 hour days. I think I'd be ready to shoot myself if I were him but he seems okay. Then again, I guess it is good to keep busy as it makes time go by quickly. He is excited to come back as we should be moving from our current base to a new one. We don't know where yet but we should find something out soon. As soon as he knows I am going to look into renting a house possibly. I really want a 4 bedroom with two kids as having a playroom would be wonderful. It depends on where we live though. If we get orders to CA or some place like that it might be impossible for us to rent a home. We are military people, we don't make a hell of a lot of money... and living in CA and trying to rent a house would be nearly impossible. I really don't want to live on base housing again. Although our current neighbors are great it is unusual in most places. We were lucky this time. Usually with base housing comes drama and everyone knows your business. If we live out in the town there is also the feeling of getting away from the military as well.
Anyway, Keith should be home at some point in April. In the next couple of months there are going to be allot of changes going on. A new baby, having my husband back, and moving... Before I know it summer will be here! It is going to be strange having Keith with us again. The last image I have of him in my head is him bending over and giving Em a kiss in the car and then getting down on his knees and kissing my belly and finally turning and leaving. When he comes back that little bean will have turned into a baby and she will be out and screaming about. I am sure it is going to be a huge adjustment for him. Not only because of the baby but Em has changed allot as well. She was talking of course but it wasn't nearly as complex as it is now. She is allot more independent and is more like a little girl. She will be 4 when he comes back and when he left she was 3 and 4 months. Allot changes.... Em still asks for him every day, multiple times a day... I am not sure that she will even know that I exists when he comes back.

And on to Emily, I have to share some of our recent conversations. I think I have already told everyone in my family multiple times as well because I am apparently loosing my mind...

Emily - Tucker is a boy, Bree is a girl, Papa is a boy, Grandma is a girl
Me - What's Daddy then Em?
Emily - (Looks at me like I am a dumb ass for asking) Daddy is a Marine and he says Orah!

I almost gave birth I laughed so hard....

Emily - Mommy, am I a princess?
Me - Yes, you are
Emily - Mommy, does that make you the Queen?
Me - Exactly

Then in Walmarts she felt the need to tell everyone that her Mommy's belly was huge and that she had a small belly... Thanks Em....

So, that about wraps up my life right now. I pretty much sit on my ass when I can and put my feet up. I am so damn tired all the time and it takes way too much energy to walk so why bother! :)

Hope you are all doing well out there in Blogger world. Later

Getting Bigger and giving Daddy Kisses

2007-12-28T11:56:00.000-05:00

A little bit of Christmas

2007-12-28T11:54:00.000-05:00

Snow and Cousins

2007-12-28T11:50:00.000-05:00

Dear Santa

2007-12-23T14:18:00.000-05:00

To all the little kids who will be missing their Daddy this Christmas...

And to my Emmy who will be too and ask me every day when her Daddy is coming home. Daddy misses you more than you could ever know. If I could get Santa to pack your Daddy in his sleigh I would but Santa has a big job to do sweety girl and so does your Daddy. He will be home in a few months but until then Remember what Daddy says, you are in his heart and he is in yours... And one day you will realize the special gift he gave you and your sister this year.

Sorry

2007-12-01T11:15:00.001-05:00

Sorry, I have been neglecting my Blog or so I have been told several times now by my father...

To tell you the truth I haven't felt like coming here and writing anything. Em has been going through allot emotionally and mentally with her father being gone. It's been very difficult on her and it's been depressing for her and I. She has been crying in the morning or at night asking for her Daddy and asking to go back to "Mommy and Daddy's home". How do I explain to a three year old who doesn't understand length of time what is going on? How do I explain to her that we just can't go home because of Mommy's baby? I can't... I just keep telling her that Daddy wants us to wait here for him and he will be home after Olivia comes. She keeps asking, I keep answering and just about every time it eats away at me that she is going through this. She cries whenever she has to say goodbye to anyone now, she says she is scared at night when she goes to bed... it is affecting her in many ways. So, knowing this Daddy sent her a video of himself reading a book and talking to her reinforcing what I have been saying. The second she say him on TV she got really upset and didn't want to watch it at first. But then I sat with her and we cuddled up on the couch and watched it together. She started crying the instant he said her name and then of course so did I. I have to say though watching him and having him explain things himself have seemed to help some. She hasn't cried for him since she has watched the video and she seems to be in a better frame of mind. He is planning on doing another one for her soon.
Emily's school has also gotten involved with trying to help her. The classes are going to send Keith cards that they have made and on top of that the parents have donated gifts to him to all be sent in a care package. I can not explain how touched I am that these people have reached out to Keith and Emily during this difficult time for her. Yesterday I saw that amount of things being sent to him and it was hard to not let that effect me. Not only is it nice to know that people are still willing to support the military members no matter their belief in the war but they also are doing it to help my daughter who is going through something very difficult for her. And no, I haven't been telling complete strangers about Em... I have had to say something to Em's teacher because Emily cries at the drop of a dime and she is the one who decided to do this for her.

Speaking of the parents at the school. Now they know I am preggo with my husband gone. Suddenly I see people there looking at me differently and feeling the need to talk to me more. Coming from a huge military base my situation is hardly unusual but here I am hardly the norm. I didn't realize how different I was here until the last time I dropped Em off at school. One mother said to me " My husband has been gone for only 7 days, I don't know how you do it." What am I supposed to say to that? It's not like I want this... I have to do it. I just wish for Em's sake it wasn't so long. I forget that most couples/families do not spend much time apart. Keith and I laugh when we watch shows like Survivor and the players start cying because they haven't seen any family member for 30 days... But I guess in the "real world" that is the reality for most people. I guess we are that different... It is hard to see that when you are in your military bubble and everyone is going through it.

So Christmas shopping is almost done! Yipee!!! Olivia is growing more and more and her movements are getting stronger. My mother can actually feel her now. It is so strange to think that the person in there is not Emily. I know that must sound really strange but to me she was the last person taking up space in there... now somebody completely different is there and it is hard to imagine who she is. I am getting more and more excited but at the same time I have started to get a bit nervous as the time gets closer as to when I delivered Em. Now that I know Olivia is viable I have become more worried about something happening. All the "What ifs"... One thing I can say though is that time is flying by... I guess after the holidays I better get my butt in gear and get the rest of what I need for her!

Anyway, I hope you all had a nice Thanksgiving! It was nice to be pregnant and eat and eat and eat.... of course I felt sick afterwards but it's not my fault... the baby wanted all that stuff!!

So, hopefully I will be on sooner than later... Have fun shopping!!

Happy Birthday!

2007-11-10T09:22:00.001-05:00

To all the Marines out there, current and former... Happy Birthday Devil Dogs!!

And to my Marine... Be Safe, Be strong, and come home soon as you are missed greatly. Your girls love you and are waiting...

To my newest Marine in my family, Shawn who just graduated boot camp just days ago... Congrats and as said before Keith and I are so very proud of you! I have always seen in my mind as the little boy with his BMX bike but after seeing your picture of you in uniform I see a grown man now... a Marine.
Your mother would have been proud...

To my Bugger Boo - Update

2007-11-01T12:47:00.001-04:00

Daddy and I found out what you are today... And we are happy, very happy. I heard this song on the radio on the way to see you today. When I saw your cute little face today I thought about how you can't say anything or do much of anything yet and I still love you more than there are stars in the sky already....

Know that Daddy and I both love you and can't wait to hold in our arms...

P.S. Keith can't keep a secret to save his life! He was way to excited to tell the world that we are having...

A Girl, Olivia Rose!

Happy Halloween!

2007-10-31T15:22:00.000-04:00

Random Venting

2007-10-24T11:27:00.001-04:00

So, as you can see below we went to go see The Wiggles finally! It was awesome if I do say so myself. When we first got there music was playing and people were still finding their seats. Em didn't get why we were there and after hearing a couple of songs she asked if we could go home. I wasn't getting frustrated with her but the little shit behind me was a different story. I of course HAD to pay 100 bucks to sit in front of the obnoxious pain in the ass kid who can't sit still for two seconds or stop kicking my kids' chair along with begging for popcorn. And to top it all off every time she felt the need to show her mother something she stretched out her arm right in between mine and Em's seat with her finger barely missing my eyeball... Some mothers should just carry duct tape around them, I swear... I have to say I was real proud of Em because for once she stuck up for herself and whipped her head around and told the little beast off. Em yelled at her saying " Stop kicking my chair!", giving the little beast a glare that would make a Marine cringe. That's my girl!!
Anyway, at first some dancers came out in costume and Em enjoyed it but then the Wiggles ran out on stage and Em's eyes BUGGED out of her head!! She screamed at me " Look Mommy, it's the Wiggles!" Hehe!! I swear I had tears in my eyes people!! Just seeing her that happy was all it took... She really enjoyed it. We watched, we sang together, and we dance out in the aisle. I emailed Keith some pictures and told him once he comes back and we have the other kido and we will all have to go together as a family.

I don't know what the deal is but time is just flying by. It seems like just about every day there is something we have to do or have planned. Which is good I guess. If I was in NC right now I know time would be going by much slower. I can't believe Halloween is next week already!

Speaking of next week... guess what? I have my BIG ultrasound to make sure everything is good to go with the baby and of course find out what the gender is. I am still getting crap from friends and family about not telling anyone. People just don't get it. Everyone has different feelings as to why we are not telling. I am not copying my sister who didn't tell the sex of her second baby nor am I copying my sister in law Kari who didn't tell the name of the baby until she was born. We are not telling people to be mean spirited or to rub it in people's faces or to tease people... I just don't think anyone really gets it. It is more than not wanting to tote a bunch of stuff back to NC. Nobody I know of has ever been without their spouse for a long period of time let alone been pregnant and given birth. Keith does not get to see my big o'l belly (and it is big people), he doesn't get to feel the baby move, he doesn't get to wake up at night because I am starving or uncomfy, he won't see his last child be born... HE WON'T BE APART OF ANY OF IT.... So, why is it so hard for people to understand that this is the ONE thing that he can enjoy? The one thing that we can share together? If I take that away from Keith then what does he get to have there? We don't even have the luxury or time to talk about names for this child, can we at least have that? My mother is the ONLY person who has said flat out to me that it is okay, and that Keith and I SHOULD do what we want. I am not saying she likes it either but at least she isn't trying to make me feel guilty about it like others have. Or just come out and say that I am copying other people. Trust me, IF I was going to copy other people I too would have Keith be apart of this experience and be there for our child's birth just like EVERYONE ELSE I KNOW. IF he was here I wouldn't give a shit who knew about the gender or what have you, but for the love of God can we just have this to share without everyone making a big God Damn deal out it? Or better yet... why not copy us and be away from your spouse, your kids for over half year then do it again 18 months later? That way in another 18 months maybe Keith won't have to go again for the third time!

Okay... so feeling a bit better... had to get that out. After all, it's my blog....And my pregnancy hormones are out of whack, I am raising a daughter who misses her Daddy and I swear she has a double case of ADHD, and my husband is in a War Zone... call me cooky, I just don't care to hear people's shit....

Anywho... Speaking of Emily. Don't anyone dare tell her this baby is a boy. She will yell and you and say "No, it's a girwl" It's cute but god help us if this child has a penis. She is getting better with the whole idea of having a baby... the other night she wanted to share her toys with it and she likes to listen to the heart beat on the Doppler. So, we are getting there.

The other day I was dressing Emily and out of the blue she asked me " Does Daddy miss me?". People, for a few seconds time stood still. You know how if you get in a car accident everything seems to go in slow motion? That is the way it was when those words came out of Em's mouth. It took every part of my being to stand there and look her in the eye without bawling and being able to talk confidently. I did a small prayer for that small favor and somehow I managed to answer her in a perky tone. "Yes, Daddy misses you every second of every day". With a big smile on my face. I think God himself was standing there holding my lips forming a smile on face. So, anyway, after telling my friend Frannie this whose husband is a former Marine and was deployed as well she gave some great advise. She suggested that I put a package together for Emily from Keith. Keith can't send anything over here. He does not have access to over 90 percent of the Internet and he works about 14 hours a day. It is next to impossible. So, I talked it over with him and he helped me think of some stuff to stick in a box for her. I ordered a bunch of pictures of just Emily and Daddy and put them in little photo album just for her. She got paper and crayons to draw pictures for Daddy, some candy, and a Strawberry Shortcake doll. Her favorite is the photo album. She looks at the sucker at least 10 times a day and she tells me or who ever else will listen about every single one. Thanks Frannie for the idea, it was awesome!

Besides all of that... everything is fine. I am feeling baby move more and more. I am hungry all the damn time still. Em is doing better in school and really likes her teacher. She is spending one on one time with her other grandparents (Keith's parents), She plays with all her cousins... My parents are dealing with us still in their house and haven't lost their minds yet. I am trying not to be grumpy or have a pity party... I bought an infant car seat and stroller. I said I wouldn't until after Christmas but I saw a floor model on sale for 100 off so it's not like I can pass up that deal... That dark line is starting to come in on my belly, it's ugly. My face is fat and I have multiple chins.... I don't' miss my house but I miss my things... I hate maternity pants. I have been having an addiction to cottage cheese and am dying for some Friendly's purple ice cream, tuna fish with mustard, and more of the chili from the restaurant down the road. What else... Days of our Lives is pissing me off and I haven't been watching it. Jason on GH is in serious need of hair cut. He is my man but damn... it is hard to look at that hair! I HATE that new show on Nick, Yo Gabba Gabba but Em loves it of course and must watch it. Hmmm, I think that is about all for now.

So, I guess I vented enough for now. Now I am hungry and must go feed. My brain can not function anymore without food and Emily is up my ass so I better go... Enjoy my mood...

All Dressed up to go see The Wiggles!

2007-10-24T11:25:00.000-04:00

Lovin the Wiggles

2007-10-24T11:24:00.000-04:00

2007-10-24T11:23:00.000-04:00

2007-10-24T11:22:00.000-04:00

2007-10-24T11:21:00.000-04:00

No Comment...

2007-10-20T10:46:00.000-04:00

Tucker and Em trying out the baby's carseat

2007-10-20T10:44:00.000-04:00

Giving up some Kisses

2007-10-20T10:42:00.000-04:00

Fatso

2007-10-20T10:41:00.000-04:00

Daddy's biggest Supporter!

2007-10-20T10:40:00.000-04:00

Gotta have a Pumkin Pic

2007-10-20T10:39:00.000-04:00

WhooooHooooo!!

2007-10-09T17:57:00.000-04:00

Can I just tell you how excited I am? Call me a geek, call me a looser, call me a MOM!! What have you!!! I just got FanFriggintastic seats to bring Emily to go and see the WIGGLES!!!! It is in two weeks!!! In NC we would have to drive at least 3 hours to see an event so we never got to go. Here in NY though they have shit all the time!! I am sooooo friggin thrilled!! I have been wanting to take her since she was little! We have floor seats right next to the stage!!! I was so happy when I printed out the tickets that I swear to you I had tears in my eyes!! I can't wait to see her face when she watches them live!! I emailed Keith and told him thanks for the anniversary gift!! LOL... Nothing could be better than watching our little girl see one of her favorite shows live and seeing the joy and amazement on her face!

WhooooooooHOOOOOOO!!!!

Did you pick a good one?

2007-09-30T16:13:00.000-04:00

Home away from Home

2007-09-29T14:45:00.000-04:00

Okay, so it's been awhile. What else is new when it comes to me blogging?

We are settling in. We have been here two weeks now. Em went through this thing where she was pissed off at me and acting like a little shit to me. I think she is over it now. She is acting more like herself again. Meaning she is just being her pain in the ass self ( I mean that in a loving motherly way of course), rather than a snotty little B that hits and kicks when mad. I don't think she fully understands that we are staying here for so long but she will get it. She has asked me if we are going home a few times and I just keep telling that it will be a long time. She keeps asking about Keith was well. She understands that he is at "special work" and that he will be gone for awhile but that is the extent of it. She is enjoying her new school though. I wouldn't say that she is the social butterfly of the class but she doesn't seem to be in panic mode while there either. It's allot of adjusting for one little girl to go through. Little does she know what it is going to be like like the baby comes along...

Speaking of the baby. I can now hear the baby's heartbeat on the Doppler (Thanks Kari), fairly easily now. A few weeks ago during my stint in the hospital it was running in the 170's but now is 155-157. I think it's going to stay at that now. Keith is insisting that it's a girl. Hopefully in the next month I will find out. And yes, we are still keeping the gender a secret!! I have also felt the little stinker move a few times just the past couple of days. It is a light tapping and is always in the same spot. I know it's early but they say you can feel things earlier the second time around. To be sure it was the baby I put the Doppler right over where I felt the tapping and sure enough there was the heartbeat...

I have heard from Keith a few times. He is working long hours every day with no days off. That sucks but I guess you don't get those in a War... He seems to be in good spirits though and maybe with working so much time will pass quickly for him. He has promised to take some pictures for Emily soon and I know Em is going to love it when she sees them. She asks every day to look at the pictures now so I know she is going to love seeing some new ones of him. Even with his bald head!! Did I forget to mention that? He shaved his head bald before leaving... I told him he needs to grow it back before he gets home! Although, I have to admit I do envy him a bit. I am ever so close to pulling a Brittany! These prenatal vitamins are making my hair grow at insane pace!! Seriously, I am sick to death of it!

Besides adjusting and all of that everything is fine. I have my moments but who doesn't in this situation? I try not to think about everything too much. Frankly I am too tired to anyway. I don't know what it is about the air in NY but it is exhausting me! I think I have been in bed by 9 every night and fell right to sleep. Of course I get up to go pee like 4 times a night now but that is just one of the perks of being pregnant.

So, The Double K will be adding two new additions to the "family". Two little girls. Kari and Ian are buying one and Keith and I the other. They are two little babies, very cute and ummmm, if you ask me very expensive! I know though that we are getting a good price but gessshhh, it's a lot of money to drop on a farm animal(s). For those of you that don't have a clue what I am talking about... Alpacas. That's right people. Keith and I are are going to be farmers when we get of the Corps. Of course that already makes Kari and Ian farmers as they have started the herd already. So, you have those stories to look forward to in 4.5 years as well. Anyway, the girls are very cute!! It was a little freaky though visiting the farm where we are purchasing them though. I had about 20 Alpaca smelling my belly. I like Alpaca a lot but I don't like 20 of them all at once smelling my belly....

So, that about sums it up. Between Alpaca shopping, winter attire shopping, getting new doctors, unpacking, school, dealing with a temper tantrum child, being pregnant and uber tired, and a husband in a war... I guess you can say not much has been going on. I just wanted to fill you in cause I know you all are on the edge of your seat waiting for this post. So, until next time people...

Turkey

2007-09-29T09:25:00.000-04:00

A new day has dawned.

2007-09-12T15:13:00.000-04:00

Keith, Emily, and I only have hours left together as a family of three. Keith will be leaving shortly, Emily and I will be going to NY... and when we are all together again we will be a family of four. It is strange to think that this is our last day together here as it has been. When we come back here we will have a new addition to the family and it will only be to pack our things and move on to the next base. I am the first to admit that I have never really liked the base housing here but as I sit and look around I can't help but think of the memories it holds for us. Emily's first steps, her yard where she explored the great outdoors, and her room jam packed full of her treasures. This place is where Em and I waited for Keith for his last deployment... where he came home and signs hung saying "Welcome Home Daddy". It has never been my favorite place but some of my favorite memories as a family have been here.

I have been in denial about Keith leaving... or rather very busy and not focusing on it. There has been so much involved with the planning and preparation for not only him leaving but for us as well. I know I can not keep him here... so I guess in a way I have not allowed myself to get into the emotions of it so that I can get on with what needed to be done. But now with only hours left it is all I can do to keep it together. I am not scared of him leaving, I have no fear of the unknown because this is not our first time doing this. I will miss him but my heart is breaking for Emily who I know will miss her daddy immensely. My heart breaks for this baby inside of me who might not get to see their daddy on the day that they are born. Keith volunteered for the Marine Corps... this is his job and I as his wife have an understanding of that. I do not feel that anyone owes us anything because our sacrifices are of our own choosing. However, I do feel that this country owes my children everything for their sacrifice. The little one will grow within and move without daddy's hand on my belly never feeling it or hear his voice. It will be born and not be held by it's daddy until he can come home. Emily will grow 8 months older, taller, more independent... She will go through Halloween without holding daddy's hand while trick or treating, Have a turkey dinner on Thanksgiving with out him, and open Santa's gifts without him as well. She will ask me every day where he is. She will miss him every day. And every day for me it will be just as hard as the first to have to answer that for her. So, America you can thank my children for being able to lay down at night and sleep through the night without fear. Their daddy is ensuring you of that right and for the freedoms you enjoy. They do it not of the choosing but because that is just what their daddy does. He is their Hero...

So, I am leaving for NY the day after Keith leaves. I will be spending the night on the road once again. It will be strange walking out this door knowing I will not be back for well over half a year. On the other hand, it will be good to be in NY and be with family. The last time Keith left it was hard being here alone. It was hard not having a "back up" and being alone all the time sucked. I know being with family will make the time go by quickly, I will be in a better frame of mind, and just being in NY at home makes me happy. Emily will have her cousins to play with and she will be attending pre-school as well so maybe she will make some friends. We will have holidays with family, I will have adults to talk to. And as if God wanted to make sure that I knew I was doing the right thing, as if I had any doubts he decided to give me a little clue on Monday. I ended up getting very sick on Sunday night into Monday morning. When I say sick I mean as in vomiting every 1-2 hours and not being able to keep even water down. I ended up going to the hospital and staying to get fluids and meds to make me stop vomiting. On Tuesday I felt like I had been hit by a Mac truck. I pretty much layed on the couch all day and even that took great effort. This morning I felt better, much better. Then as I was getting ready in the morning I noticed a spot in my eye... HOLY Shit my eyes are bleeding!! That is right people, both my eyes were sitting in a pool of blood. So, being the crazy person I am I called the hospital and demanded that I be seen to make sure the baby was okay... cause everyone knows that when your eyes bleed something might be wrong with your baby... (You can insert your eye rolls here)... so I went in and they couldn't find the heartbeat with the doppler. MUST. NOT. PANIC! Of course they do a quick ultrasound and the little one is moving, had a hiccup, and practiced it's breathing for me (sucked in some fluid)... So, all is good with baby minus it's mother. So, God, I got your point. I am going to NY and happy to be doing so....

So... I have things to do, clothes to wash, and a crap load to pack, and a house to lock up tight. I will write once I get in NY and get settled. Wish us luck. And to Keith... God Keep you safe and know that you are in my prayers. I will miss you every day and every time that I look into Emily's eyes I will see you and when little one within moves I will feel you. Know that you are with me in my heart and in our children. We will all be waiting for you. Semper Fi

Hola

2007-08-30T07:28:00.000-04:00

No, I did not forget that I have a Blog. I just have not had the energy or the time to update it. I don't even know where to start because things have been so chaotic so deal with my randomness....

NY was fun. I left early so I could spend a night on the road. It was a little strange sleeping in a hotel room by myself with Emily. I felt like a run away mom or something... Anyway, we were very busy while there and I was exhausted each and every day.
While we had fun in NY it was also in preparation for the deployment. Keith's Mustang has been left in Ian and Kari's care and all our animals are now in NY as well. My parent's have Tucker and the cat and my sister has Bree. It is so strange being here without them.Even though they drive me flippin crazy I miss the hell out of them. Anyway, I also brought a ton of clothes, jackets, and winter maternity clothes. We have also registered Emily in a new Preschool which I think she is really going to like. Here in NC we have already gotten rid of our shed, our fence, the grill, and a ton of outdoor toys. The only preparations left for this deployment is to actually get the house closed up and ready for 8 months of desertion. The plan is that once Keith gets back from Iraq we should have orders to a new base. We are basically using this house now as a storage unit until then. Luckily base housing does not have a problem with it and will be watching the house for us while we are gone.

Keith will be leaving in a few days. I have mixed emotions about it. Of course ideally he wouldn't be leaving but since he has to I just want him to go. I know that must sound horrible to people who never have been through it. But trust me, Keith is the same way. We both would rather him leave and start the countdown. It sucks to have it all looming over you. I have not even begun to explain things to Emily. I am waiting for this last weekend together to do so. She is going to have so many adjustments to go through in the next few months. Her daddy will be gone, she won't be in her own house, she will have a new school, and eventually a sibling. I think she might have picked up on some of the "vibes" as she has been quite the handful the past couple of weeks. She has been very whinny, testy, and not wanting to do what she is told. With my hormones out of whack and being so tired it has not been a good combination. It has been a difficult time for the both of us.

Once Keith leaves I will take a day or two to close up the house and hit the road. I plan on stopping in VA and doing some shopping for Emily's winter clothes and meeting up with my friend Sarah while doing so. Then afterwards I will drive a bit further into Maryland and spend the night some place. Normally I would drive straight through to NY but being pregnant it is best that I take a break. To say that my parents are being generous is an understatement. Emily, the animals, and my pregnant self, will all be staying with them for at least 8 months. Doesn't that sound like fun for them? I feel like I am running home to Mommy and Daddy but being I am a high risk during the second part of my pregnancy it makes sense to go to NY rather than stay here alone and chance everything by myself. Besides, I think Emily will enjoy herself more there than here alone. Giving birth alone doesn't sound that appealing either...

Speaking of the baby... I had an ultrasound yesterday and got to see the little one. It was moving around like crazy!! It was a relief to see it and know that it is doing well in there. I can't wait to feel it moving so I know for myself. Yesterday's appointment was uber long but we went over everything about Emily's birth. Basically I am high risk starting the second half of my pregnancy because things don't usually happen until then. Right now I am just taking things one day at a time. I am hungry and tired all damn day!! It is a struggle sometimes to do anything... I don't remember being this tired with Em. Keith and I (Okay, me), decided that we are not going to tell anyone the sex of the baby. I am not trying to be difficult or drive people crazy... I have a good reason for it. I don't want people buying things for this baby. With being in NY, not being in our house, Christmas, and having to drive everything back to NC, I don't want to have to haul it all back. I know that if I told everyone what sex the baby is they would start shopping the next damn day and the magnitude of clothes and gear that I would have to bring back upon everything else would be insane. I think the grandparents are not too happy about it but under the circumstances they need to understand. I hope to God that people do not feel the need to buy us yellow and green clothing until the baby is born. PEOPLE OF THE WORLD DO NOT DO THIS!! I promise you I will not put it on the baby so don't bother buying it!!
Other than all of that things are fine. I am just exhausted all the time. Whether it is from being pregnant, the stress and planning of the deployment, or dealing with Emily's outburst lately... I am just beat. It is a struggle to do much of anything other than sleep. So please excuse me for being absent to the blog world. I will try to update when I can and will try to do one more either before or after Keith leaves and we go to NY. I hope you all are doing well....

Until later....

It's growing

2007-08-08T12:18:00.000-04:00

Dear Coffee,

So full of flavor and arousing aroma, how I miss thee...

Dear Soda,

So bubbly and sugary and dear to me, how I miss thee too.

Yeah okay, so I am dying for some soda!! DYING!! I promised myself that I would not drink any soda or coffee for this whole pregnancy. What a bitch I am to myself!! I am off the caffeine... my body is not happy about it. I went through the withdrawals and the headaches for days now I just long to have it of every minute of every day. I know there is caffeine free soda but I do not see the benefits of feeding this baby soda so I am not. I am limited to water, milk, and juice. I fucking hate water. I have to mask it with Crystal Lite and even then my throat still closes up. It makes me want to throw up but I force myself to drink it. WHY THE HELL CAN'T SODA BE GOOD FOR YOU?

Everything else is fine. I am big as a house already. HUGE. I don't want to leave the house for fear somebody might ask me how far along I and pat my belly. I guess my body wants to do it right this time and is stretching out early getting ready. That's nice... I don't want to have to tell people I am only 7 weeks!!

I am starving all the damn time. If I don't eat I feel like I am going to throw up. The baby wakes me up around 3 and wants food badly!! I refuse to get up in the middle of the night and eat a damn meal!! So, I grab a couple of crackers and head for the couch to watch TV. Did you know that there are actually some good shows on now late at night...not all infomercials. So, anyway, I eat and then I want to throw up again. I don't, which is good but come on!! Either way I am screwed. MAKE UP YOUR MIND CHILD, FOOD OR NO FOOD?

My poor little Tucker has been sick. He has a really bad infected eye and has been in a lot of pain. I hate it when my dogs are sick... I also hate how much it friggin cost to take them to the doctor. It cost me over 200 bucks for shits sake!! He is lucky he is worth it!! Hehe...

So on Friday Em and I are heading to NY. I am leaving before Keith because I want to stop for the night. He has to work on Friday. So, I figure since we have to take two cars anyway I might as well leave the day before and spend the night like I want to. I just don't want to push myself while I am preggers. I can take my time, I will just have Em and the cat so it will be a lot less stressful. This way Keith can work and get a good night's sleep on Friday as well. So, wish us luck on the trip, especially Keith because he is going to have both the dogs!! :)

Well, that is my update... isn't it Fab? I am tired as hell so I am going to go lay down so that I can not fall asleep and do the same tonight. Enjoy.

Thus Far

2007-08-02T08:35:00.000-04:00

With this pregnancy I again am getting some "wonderful" advise right from the get go. My favorite is "Don't stress" like I did last time. For some reason people seem to think that because I was stressed that THAT was the main reason for me delivering early. First off... for those of you that don't know. I bleed through out the WHOLE pregnancy with Em. I had to have ultrasound every week... Yeah, I was a bit worried she might not make it. Call me cookey. Secondly, me being worried did not cause Preeclampsya to reek havoc on my body. Nor did it cause the massive blood clot or my placenta tearing away from the Uterus. So, you can say that I am a bit sick already of people telling me to have more of a "positive" mind set during this pregnancy... because "maybe those things won't happen again if I stay positive...."

Anywho... Besides that... I am good. I have been going over in my head things that I will do differently this time with this baby. Me above EVERYONE else wants to have a natural birth. I want that more than anything. Knowing that the end result of this pregnancy is not having surgery and a healthy baby is most important to me. However, my doctor is going to have to decide that after going over my records. It really depends on how the last C-Section was preformed. So, that is a wait and see for now.
Another thing I can safely say is I promise myself I will "Never say Never"... I learned that quickly with Em. I know I have awhile but I am having a difficult time deciding whether or not to nurse. With Em I felt I didn't have a choice because she desperately needed it. My issue with it is me. If I happen to get an infection (AKA Mastitis), I will more than likely have to have surgery to replace an implant since the infection does not leave the implant itself. On the other hand, I really want to nurse. So, I have a lot of thinking to do about this...
Some other things I have been thinking about is what I really need to buy and what I had last time that I really didn't need. I really don't need a changing table. I hardly ever changed Em in a designated area. I am not going to get all the bedding this time. I didn't use the comforter for Em and I changed sheets so often from pee accidents that I could have cared less. I will get a bumper pad and I still have Em's sheets... I am going to get a smaller portable swing. My bigger one annoyed me last time because it was difficult to bring it to different rooms or bring it anywhere if we were visiting. I plan on splurging on a nicer pack and play. I don't care so much about cute little outfits this time either, at least while they are so tiny. I had so many newborn dresses for Em and I never left the house to put her in them. This time I want a oncies. That is all I ever had Em in, that or those sleeper things. I had to change her all day anyway, and I was the only one who saw her!! I think I am going to get one of those slings as well... with chasing a then 4 year old and a newborn I think it might be easier to have one.
So, as you can see I have a list going. I am sure it will change as time goes on. Being pregnant again you can't help but at laugh at some of the stuff you did and had for your first child. Another lesson that I learned with Em was the whole eating thing. I used to stress over how much Em ate or didn't eat because she was so small. Now I know it doesn't matter... No matter how old or what size you can't force a child to eat!! They will eat when they are hungry and that's that!!

Besides me making mental lists in my head everything is fine. Em is good. Although she loves babies she doesn't seem to be too thrilled that Mommy has one in her belly. There are times when she wants to kiss the baby but for the most part she screams that it is " Aunt Kawwi's baby" She seems to think that because Aunt Kari just had a baby that it can't possibly be mine.... Or else she is in denial....LOL
We are all going to NY in next week. We need to get some things organized there and Keith really wants to see Sami before he goes. He has yet to. It is kind of a last minute decision but I guess that is how things go with us!! Then shortly after we get back Keith leaves for Iraq and Em and I leave back for NY. Things as always are hectic and chaotic with us!!

So, until later... In the mean time why don't you tell me what you would do or did differently with your second...

Checking In

2007-07-26T07:13:00.000-04:00

Sorry to leave you hanging like that with such big news. And when I say Big I mean it... I feel huge already!

Anyway, Even though Keith and I never do anything to prevent getting pregnant this was a surprise to me. I really didn't think that it would happen again... not after waiting so long to have Em. It hasn't fully sank in yet... for either of us. It hit me the other day that I could have a boy...LOL I know that sounds strange but I just can't picture having a son. Either way though I will be happy so long as I actually have a normal pregnancy and delivery. That would be great!!

So, I feel the need to answer a couple of questions that people have been asking already...

1. How do you feel? Fine, I have a lot of stretching pains and some bouts of nauseousness.
2. When are you due? March 25Th
3. Have you picked out any names yet? Yes actually...
4. And the ever so stupid ass question... Wasn't Keith gone for 2 weeks? I am over 5 weeks pregnant... do the math!! Actually, if everyone must know... We are pretty sure it happened the day before he left which was the 4Th of July. Keith thought it would be cute to name a girl Liberty, ahhh, I don't think so!!

So, now that I answered the burning question on every one's mind...

This little Bugger is planning on coming into the world when it's father is in Iraq. Or so we think. There is always the hope that Keith might be back by then... we shall see. So, since I had a horrible pregnancy and delivery with Em we both decided it would be best if I went to NY once Keith leaves. This way if I have to be on bed rest or anything else comes up then we have family to watch Emily. We haven't worked out all the kinks yet but it is going to happen. I just hope my insurance company won't be a pain in the ass about it... after all, why make things easy and less stressful?

So, that is it in a nutshell so far.

Emily was very sick last week. She had a very high fever and actually passed out with her eyes rolling in her head. It was pretty scary!! She is doing much much better now though and is over her tonsillitis! She likes to keep me on my toes when Keith is gone!!

Not much is going on. Just wanted to check in... Hope you all are doing well... Thanks for all the good wishes! :)

I got a little something

2007-07-23T12:33:00.000-04:00

This is what happens when you get rid of all your baby stuff...

I have to know

2007-07-13T22:05:00.000-04:00

I am reading a book that takes place in Scotland. When I read it I actually read the characters with a Scottish accent. WTF is wrong with me? Do any of you do this or is it just me?
Aye, I do believe I might be a bit daft!

Good book by the way... if you like historical romance which I love so don't be rolling your eyes!!

A Turd

2007-07-11T08:28:00.000-04:00

Once your kido starts having conversations there is no telling what is going to come out of their mouth. This is a conversation that Em and I had yesterday after she went Poopey.

Em gets off the toilet with her underwear still down around her feet, turns around, looks in the toilet and screams " Mommy, Look, my Poopey is HUGE! IT'S HUGE MOMMY, MY POOPEY IS HUGE"

Me - "Emily Please stop screaming that, I can hear you, I am foot away from you."

Emily " Look Mommy (Pointing to her beloved huge turd), my poopey is huge! I DID A HUGE POOPEY"

Me- "Yes Emily I see (Trying to wrangle her clothes back on), good job, and yes it is huge. Now please stop screaming about your huge poop"

Emily is finally dressed and she breaks out into a sprint down the hallway. I get out of the bathroom and find her sitting on the couch with her Magnadoodle. Five seconds later she is screaming for my attention again and talking about her big turd.

Me - " Emily I know you did a big poopey, I am proud, good job doing poopey on the potty. Now please for the love of God stop yelling about your big poopey"

Emily - Turns her magnadoodle around to show me how she actually drew a picture of her "Big poopey" She was ever so proud of her picture and her big poopey.

I could not believe my child was so happy about taking a massive shit that she felt the need to actually draw a picture of it. She was laughing her ass off by the way as she showed me. I think she might have my sense of humor....

So yesterday was one of "THOSE" kind of days. You know exactly what I mean. I think Emily was pissed at me for making her go to daycare yesterday. She hadn't been in along time and was not happy with me when I dropped her off. I didn't have much of a choice since I had a dental appointment and really didn't want to deal with her while there. Anyway, when I picked her up she seemed like she was happy to see me, little did I know she must have used her time there to plot her revenge.
I brought her home and gave her a healthy snack because the woman told me Em didn't eat much of a lunch. I went down the hall to my room to try on my new Vicky Secret Bras that I picked up after my appointment and lo and behold they don't fit. Shit. Now I have to drag her ass to the mall to do an exchange. So, I gather her up, her snack and we are off. I pull out of the driveway and she has thrown her snack all over my car. I pull over in front of my house, use the F word several times before opening her door and let her know I am not happy with what she has done and clean up. I get back in the car drive about 500 feet and she starts screaming for her blankey. It was in the washing machine... try to calmly explain that to a child that is screaming at the top of her lungs. Anyway, we make it to the mall and she is good up until we get in Vicky Secrets. The beast emerged. You know how when they have their annual sale they have all their bras in those circular bins? Well, Emily was running around them. I told her stop then she starts spinning in circles bouncing into displays. You KNOW people were looking at me at this point. Now I am desperately flinging bras around trying to find the right size and something that I kind of like to get the hell out of there. Finally I find two and go to the counter. There is a line... Fucking great. It gets worse. Emily moves about two feet from me and puts her finger on something that can break. She turns around and looks at me like " What the fuck are you going to do?" So... I tell her " I am going to throw your precious blankey away in the garbage when we get home." (okay, kind of mean but desperate times call for desperate measures.) She screams NOOOOOOO backs off then stands there giving me that look like she is going to run off and wants me to chase her. Dear God in heaven, why is it wrong to duct tape your child to your leg while you are trying to shop?... Just saying....
So at this point I pick her and she is not making it easy people. She is throwing her limbs every where and screaming. If I thought people were staring before they definitely were now. It takes a lot effort to hold your 30 pound child while they are going ape shit in your hands. I am finally next in line and the clerk says " Are you ready?" then says "Oh yeah, you look ready!" Bitch... I am going to fucking knock you out... just ring me up....
Anyway, after all is said and done we got home and all day Emily did everything in her power to try and piss me off. I hate those kind of days. They are exhausting for both of us...

So... I have never been a freak about the way I feed Emily... meaning I have always let her have a snack here and there. Meaning crapola. Nothing major and not a lot. But I don't see anything wrong with letting a kid have a piece of chocolate at least once a day. Not as a main meal... not a whole bag of M&M's and not when ever they want it. My motto is "Everything in moderation" However, there is one thing I refuse to bend on... Soda, Pop, or Coke... depending on where you are from. I am beginning to feel like I am the only person who does not allow their kid to have it. I honestly don't give a crap if you give your kid soda...I really don't. It's your kid, do as you please. I am just saying that I really honestly feel like I am the only one who does not give it to their kid. I went to a small cook out this past weekend and there were a lot of kids there. Every single one of them had a can of soda in their hand at some point. I guess it threw me for a loop because I didn't know I was a freak about it. So, am I a freak? How many of you let your kids drink it? Not that I am going to change my mind... she is still not drinking it. I just want to prove a point to myself that I am indeed a freak.

Anyway, that is all... until later.

I told ya

2007-07-09T21:31:00.000-04:00

He used to snuggle with me! What the hell people? :)

Feeling Lucky?

2007-07-09T10:52:00.000-04:00

How lucky am I to have a friend that will pack up her hubby and her two kids to drive a half hour over to my house to surprise me and Em with dinner? Very lucky! Thank you Frannie, Ed, Dam, and my Chunky Monkey (Cullen) for stopping by last night. We both had an awesome time! Love you all!!! :) You guys are the bestest of the best!!

Emily had a dry Night time pull up this morning!! DRY!! Let's keep our fingers crossed, shall we?

I have had three messages from Keith on my line phone answering machine. The first one I was at the beach with Emily. The second time I was at the grocery store. The third time I was at Frannie's house for dinner. Yesterday I was home all damn day and not one phone call. This morning I ran over to Wally World because they finally got the TV that Keith and I have been wanting for our bedroom. They had ONE... I literally threw Em in clothes and pushed my hair back. Huhhh, I don't think we brushed our teeth... Anywho... I thought for SURE he was going to call and luckily he didn't. Now fucking call damn it, I am going to be home all damn day waiting!!

So, I just spent about 700 bucks without telling my husband before hand. Holy crap!! I mean we kind of discussed it... but I am not sure if I definitely said I was going to be buying it while he was gone. I don't normally spend over 50 without letting him know. Not that he gives two shits but I don't want to throw off our budget without letting him know I am before hand. See... again, I can be nice. So, I wonder what he is going to think when he comes home and sees this huge box sitting in his computer room. Then again, it is a 32 inch LCD HiDef TV with a built in DVD player... Who is really going to complain about that one?

So... I think I might brush my teeth or something. I don't know why, not going anywhere or doing anything. I guess since I have a dental appointment tomorrow though I better start cleaning the filth ahead of time.

Until later...

Nappy Time

2007-07-08T15:52:00.000-04:00

I am trying like hec not to bite the skin on my fingers. I have been doing it since I was a little girl. It is a horrible habit. I am sick of it but it is a hard habit to break. I am tired of my fingers always looking like shit. I would like them to look nice for a change... We shall see how I do. I wonder if the skin will heal or if it will still be red and scabby looking? I need to find another habit to keep from biting my fingers. I can't smoke, Keith will kill me... I can't drink because of Em... Hmmm... I will have to think about this one.

So, Keith is gone. I was bored today and cleaned my kitchen. Yippee. I actually took things out of my cabinets, bleached counters, and uncluttered. I need help. LOL I also cleaned the inside of my car. I want to tackle my laundry room (okay, it's more or a closet), shelves but I think I filled my quota of analness for today. Have I told you that I have become obsessed with cleaning my new car? You would think that shit would wear off... it's me we are talking about. I am not usually good with my cars. I tend to let my inner slob come out when it comes to maintaining them. This car however I tend to freak if it's dirty. Like if I go to the beach and there is fucking sand sitting in it over night... I tend to not sleep at night and think about it. I guess it's true love people... I guess Keith will be happy to hear that I finally want to keep a car past the 24 month period.

I wonder if the creature knows that Keith is gone? I have been looking out back for him but have yet to see any signs that he has been by. Maybe he is afraid that Emily will want to befriend him. She is crazy when it comes to animals. We went to the farm yesterday where I take my lessons and she wanted to play with the horses. As in she wanted to run around in the pasture with them. I held her in my arms and showed her how to hold her hand to allow a horse to smell you or take food from you. I thought she would be apprehensive and maybe snatch her hand back once the horse approached her. She didn't flinch people. The horse licked her hand, nuzzled her, and smelled her tummy. She giggled in delight and didn't want to stop touching him. I have to say that she listened well when I told her things on how to pet and hold her hand. But she did not want to listen when I told her she couldn't get in the stall or pastures with them. She has no fear what so ever. They also have dogs that are eye level with Em and she was hugging them and petting on them as well. No fear. I don't want to teach her to fear animals but I some how need to teach her to respect them. I don't quite know how to do that yet.

Nothing exciting going on. It was a boring kind of day. Em is actually napping for the first time in forever. It doesn't happen often people. So, I am enjoying the down time for a bit.

Babies babies every where. Kari has one... Frannie has one... Friends in Blogger land have some... I can't help but have them on the brain lately. I really want another child. I want it to happen out of the blue again. I don't want to do the testing. I don't want to go through all that disappointment again. And let's face it. I am 35. It needs to happen soon or it shouldn't happen at all. It would not be fair to the child in my opinion. Anyway, so I want another kid but I guess I am not willing to do much to get it in the way of medical intervention. So, where does that leave me... I guess living life and seeing what happens. So, if any of you want to put in a few requests upstairs that would be nice. Maybe point out too to him that waiting another 10 years really isn't the best idea this time... Just sayin'

Anyway, I am leaving you with a song that I love. I think of Em of course when I hear it and all my nieces and nephews but since I have a new little girly in the family I tend to think of her a bit more when I hear it. I might have to do another video for her... hehe...

He Loves Her

2007-07-07T09:55:00.000-04:00

He Must... He looks soooo happy here doesn't he? Okay, so not so much... But he does adore her. So much so that he insist on sleeping with her in her bed now. Trader... :)

Can I get a High Five?

2007-07-06T08:06:00.000-04:00

I would like to take a moment and Thank the Lord above for finally switching the Potty Power button to the ON position in my child's brain! That is right people... This house is now diaper free. FREE OF DIAPERS! Whooooohooooooo!!! :)
It was rough people.... It started off with explaining to Em that she was now a "Big Girl" and it was time for her to wear her big girl pants. We told her that she had to throw her baby pants away and she did. Then the floods started. I think I filled my quota of picking up piss... Thank you. We did the bride with the M&M's at first. Then we moved to just stickers and now we just expect her to do it with no prize. The first two days were hell...no I am sorry, Fucking hell. All is said and done now and she is 100 percent potty trained during the day. The night is a different story. I tried and I am tired of cleaning sheets every day already. So, we are taking a break from it and I will try again soon. There is only so much piss cleaning one mother can take...

So, after Em and I got back from NY Keith met us home the following day. I picked him up from being in the desert for 3 weeks and had Chinese food and beer waiting for him. Yeah, sometimes I am a nice person... We spent the weekend together doing family things like going to the beach, shopping, watching movies... then his parents came to visit the following Tuesday. Now everyone is gone again as of yesterday morning. Keith is or still in route to Iraq for a short stint before his actual deployment. It sucks that he has to go now but nothing that either of us can do about it. I just hope that he comes home safe and sound...

Big Brother started it's new season last night. Anyone watch it? Anyone an addict like myself? I love that show!! My sister and I even made my father watch it last year. We took over his TV when I was in NY so that is why. Anyway, I am not sure who I like/don't like yet but that blonde haired chick kept freaking me out... she looks so much like Anna Nicole Smith! Anyway, I am uber excited about the show, I know... I am geek, I have been told many A times!

Nothing much else is going on. I haven't had much time to do anything with traveling, In-laws, and cleaning up piss every few minutes. I miss taking pictures and having some one on one time with Em. I think I am going to take her for a nature walk while Keith is gone and her and I can take pictures. She likes to see what I take afterwards. My father bought me a disk that teaches me how to use the features on my exact camera. I haven't had time to sit and look/learn but I am thrilled about it. Now maybe I can take better pictures after viewing it. Other than the nature walk though I haven't much planned while Keith is gone. I just want to spend some time with Em alone and enjoy her. She is going to go to school this coming year 4 days week for three hours at a time. I know that doesn't seem much but it is just the beginning of what is to come. No more little baby... She is a big girl now with going to school. Emily will have a lot going on this coming Fall. She has school and her father will be going away for a long time. I want to use this alone time with her to talk to her, have fun, and enjoy the down time together. At least for this next deployment Emily can speak and understand what I am saying to her. That is a major plus for me and hopefully it will ease her stress as well. Speaking of her talking... it is so strange to actually be able to have a conversation with her now. Just 6 months ago we were still at the 3 word broken sentence stage but since she has really flourished. She uses the words "I", "me", "you" now and she never did that before. Her sentences are longer and pronounces her words better. She is really such a big girl now... where did the time go? It wasn't that long ago that we were so worried about her speech and now she is talking non stop!! I am so proud of her!
Well, on that note I should probably get ready for the day and do some stuff around the house. Hope you all had a good holiday...

Long time No See

2007-06-26T06:19:00.000-04:00

The drive to NY was horrible people. HORRIBLE! The 12 hour drive turned into a 19 hour nightmare. Em pissed through her clothes three times. At one point I had to look for a Super Walmarts to get super soaker diapers in hopes of it not happening again. Even with them on it happened again.... twice. In crappy ass Jersey (Sorry people of Jersey but every time I go through your Lovely state I find more reasons to not like it so much), I was in a traffic accident Jam. You know, the ones where you only move 2 miles in over two hours? And basically to sum it all up every time I had to pee, get food, change Em, let the dogs out, what the hell ever... every bit of it had to be planned out prior to actually doing it. I can't let the dogs out to pee without a grassy spot... I can't let them out without being close to the car because of Em. Every time I had to take a piss I had to find a shaded spot for the dogs, I had to bring Em with me, keep the dogs from jumping out of the car at the same time.... It was just a pain in the ass!!!

BUT aside from the drive from hell the trip was nice. Em loves being at my parent's house. I am not sure if it is them, the crap she gets to eat there, the stairs to climb, or the millions of toys they have but she adores being there. Every hour in the drive from Hell she would ask if we were at "PaPa's house" yet.

Em also got to meet her new little cousin Sami. She was jealous at first. I think because I took the baby right away and Em didn't have much of a chance to get comfy yet. She did "hold" her though and when we saw her again she was much more interested in her. I think she was kind of interested too in Aunt Kari's belly and trying to figure out how the hell the baby got out of it!! :)))) Sami is awesome by the way. I love her!!! I am also "paying back" Ian and Kari for all the stuff they have bought Em over the past three years. I really enjoy the expressions on their faces as I come over with big ass toys for them to fit in their house now... Hehe... I am sure we will all have fun over the years paying each other back !! :) Besides that Kari looks great and is a great Mommy!!

So, one of Em's highlights on the trip was my sister bringing her and her kidos to see Diego Live. Em LOVED IT!!! I wasn't sure since we live in a small town and do not have the opportunity to take her to things like that. Kristin said she was in a trance the whole time and when she came home her eyes were huge with excitement. Of course Em also loves playing with my sister's kids. She had her normal mind melt with Catie, you can't separate them when they are together. Em loves running around the house with Joey and seemed to bond with him a lot more this time. Em even acknowledge Scotty on this trip and talked about him when we got home. She remembers everyone in her family now and talks about them from time to time. It makes me want even more to move home to NY when Keith retires. She acts so differently when she is around all of them. I think her true personality comes to light, she expresses her self more, and over all she is more happy. I know TX is cheaper and we could afford to have a lot more material things but I think for Emily alone we should go back to NY. I really think it would be unfair to not give her that gift of knowing all her family. That gift and the gift of learning how to pick up Alpaca and horse poo....

So, upon our return from NY Keith meet us a day later. He is home for another week then takes off for Iraq for a couple of weeks. Then comes back... has more training... then actually goes to Iraq again. I know in many ways that this deployment will be better compared to the last because I know what to expect this time. I also know how much harder it is going to be on Emily. Just in the two weeks that we were in NY without Keith she asked for him several times and was highly upset/pissed that he wasn't there. I really feel that I might have to take advantage of the base's workshops and attend them this time. I do not know how to tell Emily in a way that she understands what is going on. Telling her that daddy is at "Special Work" this time does not seem to be enough. I know that keeping her mind occupied as much as possible is a start but that is only part of the answer. I need her to understand as much as possible what is going on. I know that her school has councilors and I think I am going to tell the school that I want her to go when Keith leaves. These kind of situations to the school on base are hardly new to them and I know Emily would benefit from it. Maybe they will let me go too! Hehe....

So, I am not one to spend money on myself in the way of fashion. I am sporting a 20 dollar bag and usually a T-shirt with jeans. And the T-shirt is usually faded with a few holes in the mix. Don 't get me wrong... I like nice clothes... nice purses... but what is the point people? I have a three year old, a house to take care of, and a husband to wait on....what the hell am going to dress up for? And besides all of that I would rather spend the money on Em. I enjoy buying her nice clothes and want her to look cute and girly when we are out and about. My friend Frannie though has a thing for Coach bags.... I have told her many times they are nice but I would never spend the money on myself. However... when I was in NY I went to the huge ass mall there and they have a Coach store. I went in. I liked what I saw. I liked what I saw A LOT!! I started looking at them on the Internet. Now I am wanting one. I find myself drooling... What the hell is wrong with me? I like them a lot but I would never get one because I would feel guilty as hell if I did... However, a girl can look can't she?

Here is a true story... Yesterday Keith and I were cleaning the house together. By the way... I highly recommend NOT cleaning your house with a Marine who is used to "Field Day"... a Marine who is used to inspecting younger Marines and making them do their shit over. A Marine who has been doing this for over 15 years now. Our day pretty much went like this :

Me - "Keith, I already dusted that, It's clean"
Keith - (AKA, ANAL Boy) " You cleaned this already"
Me - "Yesssss, I did"
Keith (Looking at me in a questionable manner, rolling his eyes), "Are you SURE that you cleaned this?" (As he is RE FUCKING CLEANING IT)

Me - "Yes, I AM sure... I am also fucking sure that I want to beat your ass right now...."

This is what Marriage is really like people... It's love... true love.

So anyway... We had Emily in her room playing with her toys. We are also in full swing with the potty training. No pull-ups. Nothing to catch the pee or poo... It's Oh so fun!! So, Emily starts calling me from her room and I go to see what's up. I go in to her room and it smells like shit. "Oh crap"... I do a quick sweep of the room and find nothing. Emily tells me she did a yucky... "Ummm, Em where is your yucky?" I checked and her booty and she had nothing on it. No poo... no streaks... nothing. Now the fear of her eating her own shit is really starting to set in. "Emmy, please tell Mommy where your Yucky is" (Panic panic, breath breath) So, she takes my hand and leads me to her play kitchen. Yup people... She picked up her log of shit and placed it in one of the cupboards of her play kitchen. This is one of those stories that is definitely going in the baby book people!!

So until later... and with me you know it's going to be later and not sooner...

Bye

Emmy and Sami, Cousins and soon to be friends!

2007-06-19T15:51:00.000-04:00

First time at the Beach This Year

2007-06-06T20:48:00.000-04:00

Go ahead and TRY to tell me that she wouldn't make the best Gap model you've ever seen!

She may very well be the most gorgeous thing I have ever seen (Besides my two nieces of course, the are my two other beauties!)... Okay, so I know I am her Mommy and that has a lot to do with it... But every time I look at her I can't get over how beautiful she is. Sometimes I just stare at her in disbelief. I guess every mother does that...LOL

The other day Keith and I went to Best Buy and the greeter at the door (AKA the guy that leans on the podium and checks out the asses that walk by), stopped Keith as we were walking out. Mind you this guy was in his 50's... and he said to Keith " Hey Daddy, I was just wondering what you are going to do 10 years from now" and Keith said "Ahhh What?" and Greeter guy replies " Look at your daughter NOW, can you imagine what she is going to look like 10 years from now? What are you going to do?" Keith simply replied "It's simple, I already want to fucking shoot people now that just look at her, So in 10 years I am sure I will be okay with doing it" Greeter guy shut up. Greeter guy better shut the hell up !Mr. fucking dirty old man making comments about my little girl. He is lucky his eyeballs are still in his sockets.... Is it just me or is that a totally strange thing to say to somebody that you don't know?

Anyway, we are leaving the day after tomorrow and I get to see my new little niece Samantha... AKA "SaaaMee "as Emily calls her. On Saturday Em is going to see Diego with Aunt Kristin and my other two loves Joey and Catie... I can't wait to get my hands on them all and get lots of hugs and kisses. I will try to get some lovin from Scotty but he is older... you know how that is. I am crazy Aunt Julie to him...LOL (Not much different than how the rest of the family views me really, he MUST be growing up)

So, I will Cya around.... Until later people. Wish me luck on the God forsaken 12 hour drive...

Boring

2007-06-04T07:04:00.000-04:00

Sorry people, no pictures of the baby yet. I think Kari is coming home today though so hopefully she will get a chance in the next couple of days to add some pictures to her Blog. I have seen a couple pictures on my phone though and she looks just like her daddy!!

So, Keith is leaving at some point this week to go to a training exercise for three weeks. On Friday when Emily gets out of school I am plopping her hiney in the Prius (I named her Glenda, as in the good witch on Oz, as in MY good Bitch... I know, I am a geek), and we are headed for a road trip to New York. I figure with Keith gone and a new baby in the family that it makes total sense! So, I guess I am pulling an all nighter. I am hoping to be on the road by 4. That means I will be pulling up in my parents driveway around 4 or 5 am. Yippee...doesn't sound like fun?I figure on Saturday I will basically be in a coma all day after traveling for 13 hours by myself all night with a three year old and two dogs. So on Sunday I will go and see the new little bugger in the family. I can't wait!

So, I or we I should say, have created a sleep monster. Or a monster who doesn't sleep, or a monster who has really bad sleeping habits... however you want to look at it. Basically Emily doesn't nap anymore. (I still try once in a while but it is pointless) So, she is up all day and wound up and hyper until around 5 O'clock when she becomes the she devil. Usually after she eats she is pretty good, goes and plays then by 7 she is ready for a movie to watch in my bed. It is my way of getting her to sit still and shut up before putting her to bed since she does not allow me to read to her at all. Anyway, she has been falling asleep while watching the movie which is good. The fucking horrible part is that on the off chance that we just put her to bed without a movie she refuses (Okay, has a meltdown), to go to bed by herself. Anyway, while she is asleep I sneak her in her bed. Here is the other thing... By 11:20 is sneaks back in bed with us. It wouldn't be so bad IF she slept like a normal human being but she doesn't! She sleeps with her head pushed in on my stomach and her feet pushed up under Keith's. This leaves Keith and I on the edge of the bed hoping that we do not fall off. Normally after she falls back asleep I pack up my gear and head for the couch. I know you are thinking " Why don't you just put her back in her bed when she falls asleep?" Because I although Em might be asleep her inner devil is not and when I TRY to pick her up to put her back the devil screams like a banshee. Is that a good enough reason for ya?

Some may say that I am spoiling her and to those people who are probably people with out a children (I know because I was one of those people),I say this, I JUST WANT TO FUCKING SLEEP! Sometimes you do what you have to do and this is what I fucking have to go through every night to get some damn sleep!!

So I am totally loving my new car... the gas mileage is incredible. The drive is smooth... I love the look inside and out. I got my dual headrest installed. LOVE IT. Of course Toyota probably hates me but whatever. It cost them 2 thousand bucks...I must really be a bitch because they are STILL calling me every couple of days to make sure that I still love everything. I just refuse to walked on anymore or taken advantage of and I know now after Keith being gone so much that I can handle things for myself. Even my friend Frannie said I am a scary bitch sometimes (Not to her), and she is from NY City...

I brought Keith (More or less made him go with me), to a riding lesson since he had the day off. God has a sense of humor people... I finally took the plunge. Literally. I fell or got bucked, whatever, off the horse. I won't get into the long story as to why but basically the horse fell and got pissed that I was hanging on for dear life and pulling on his reins to hard. I was concerned about getting stomped on afterwards and Keith was concerned that my old ass broke something. I saw a bit of fear in his eyes...LOL God forbid he has to cook because I can't with a broken arm....Hehe. Nothing broken, just sore. Very sore. The good news is that I got it over with and I am not scared of it or fearing it if you will. It's good to get that out of the way.... Besides entertaining God and Keith... I am still loving it, everything about it.

Well, I guess my ass better go and do something for day... Later

Can I have your attention please!

2007-06-02T15:39:00.000-04:00

The baby is coming!! Kari is in labor and at the hospital now!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UPDATE!!! She is here!! I have a new niece!!! I am not going to tell you the name, I will leave that up to Mommy but she is a beauty!! Both Mommy and baby are doing great!!!! Congrats to Kari, Ian, and Scotty!! I love you all and I am so thrilled for you!! I will see you all next week!!

Happy Birthday little one!! Your Aunt Julie, Uncle Keith, and cousin Emily love you very much!! God Bless you!!